While the pain is on the decrease, my sleep patterns are completely fucked up. I know Druff posted on and on about his anxiety issues and how they affected his life. I can relate now. Waking up at 2am fearful of going back to sleep over anxiety of a blood clot given my huge bruise is taking its toll. Then you sit alone in your office pitch dark in pain, it just wears on the psyche. Then I starting going through all the dumb shit I did over the years, how much more money I'd have for my family if I just played it close to the vest, played by the rules. This morning I remembered that stupid fucking oil well I "invested in", turned out to be a scam, lost thousands. Then the stupidity of online poker. Gambling on penny stocks. It's all come to a head with this fucking injury and keeping me up most of the night. I can see why people enter a depressive state, sitting in a dark room for hours in pain is mentally crippling. I know Druff posted during the height of his anxiety he'd pay $500,000 to have his issues go away. I don't have that type of revenue, but I'd write a check for $20,000 in a snap minute if I could make this injury and anxiety just go the fuck away.