Phone calls from "Microsoft" that say your computer has a virus/malware

[simpdog]

Do Americans get these calls too?

It's obviously someone from India phoning up saying you have malware/virus and they will "walk you through the fix". In the end they end up just installing software on your computer then they regularly charge you $50-100 every month to maintain.

I troll these guys all the time so unfortunately that also likely ups my chances of getting calls.

Simp: Where are you from
Guy: Arlington
Simp: What city is close to Arlington
Guy: Let's focus on your comp issue.

yadda yadda yadda...he is now pissing me off.

So I up the ante a little.

Simp: Don't ever f'n call me again
Guy: F off
Simp: I f'd your mother last night and she wasn't so rude like you are
Guy: I f your mother (he kept saying this like 5 times, I definitely got to him).

Then his best line came out.

Guy: I fucked your mother and that's why you are here.

I couldn't stop laughing. All his comebacks were just repeating what I said, but that line had me lol'ing to the point where I couldn't talk for a minute.



I need to get rid of home phone to avoid these, but I'm tempted to start recording my calls with them.

[limitles]

Not a bad scam considering literally everyone's history with that product(can't even bring myself to say the company name).

They should really have that message imprinted directly bellow the serial number of each machine.

[BeerAndPoker]

Yes they do call Americans.

I fuck with them guys whenever they call me. They want to install some teamviewer type of program on your computer and obviously steal all personal information saying they can tell you have viruses because they work for microsoft,etc...

That guy saying what he did is hilarious because usually I just get an Indonesian guy who keeps saying something like "No scam we here to help and no cheat you".

I tried to report one of these calls one time and the phone company wasn't very cooperative. They said these places can spoof numbers and it's hard to tell where they are coming from but appreciate me calling to voice my concern,etc...

[tyde]

Do Americans get these calls too?

It's obviously someone from India phoning up saying you have malware/virus and they will "walk you through the fix". In the end they end up just installing software on your computer then they regularly charge you $50-100 every month to maintain.

I troll these guys all the time so unfortunately that also likely ups my chances of getting calls.

Simp: Where are you from
Guy: Arlington
Simp: What city is close to Arlington
Guy: Let's focus on your comp issue.

yadda yadda yadda...he is now pissing me off.

So I up the ante a little.

Simp: Don't ever f'n call me again
Guy: F off
Simp: I f'd your mother last night and she wasn't so rude like you are
Guy: I f your mother (he kept saying this like 5 times, I definitely got to him).

Then his best line came out.

Guy: I fucked your mother and that's why you are here.

I couldn't stop laughing. All his comebacks were just repeating what I said, but that line had me lol'ing to the point where I couldn't talk for a minute.



I need to get rid of home phone to avoid these, but I'm tempted to start recording my calls with them.

LOL

HOF

[Belly Buster]

Just got exactly the same, managed to keep him on the line for 45 minutes playing along until he hung up on me.

I possibly had the 2nd half of the call recorded. If I can find a way of posting it I will.

[simpdog]

looks like this thread has potential. I'll work on recording one in the next week or two when they call.

[4Dragons]

I have to be on this list somewhere, but haven't gotten a call yet, I will be prepared if I do get one though.

Here are a list of call recorder apps for Android:

https://play.google.com/store/search...r&c=apps&hl=en

[cmoney]

Funny, right after I read this thread I got a call from some guy trying to sell me an extended warranty on my car .

At first it was some Indian guy, and then once I showed interest, I was transferred to his "supervisor."

I told him my I had a 2013 Cadillac with 140,000 miles. lol

He didn't skip a beat and kept telling me about all the coverage plans. We settled on the one with the down payment of 480 dollars because that was the best deal. He ran 8 different fake credit cards I gave him (all coming back declined obv). Once we got to the 9th fake card, I had something else to do so I told him to go fuck himself and hung up the phone.

[phantom]

these are doing the rounds in australia at the moment, ive had the Microsoft call about 6 times in the past few months.

the first few times i just told them to go fuck themselves but it the last few ive pretended to be a computer newb and gone along with them for 15 minutes or so.

they usually try and get into your computer by windows remote assistance or get you to go to some website and download their teamviewer type program.

i go along with them and tell them ive downloaded the program but i cant install it im getting an application error, then they ask what operating system i have and i say something like windows 98

[phantom]

Also a mate of mines father got rolled by these pricks about a month ago (70 years old, fairly recently got home internet connection, absolute prime candidate)

Anyway the call went something like this:

Hi this is Currybreath from Telstra (austalias largest isp and happens to be this dudes isp)
I am sorry but we are going to have to disconnect your internet connection because your computer has been hacked and has viruses and is causing problems on our network

Old dude: oh shit isnt there anyway i can fix it

currybreath: Yes sir i can fix it for you now over the phone. go onto your computer and follow my instructions. (gains access via windows remote assistance program)
Throws back some kind of personal info that hes just gleaned off the computer to put old dudes mind at ease that he really is from Telstra before he asks for credit card.
Sir sorry i cannot fix this because your windows license is expired. Its $9 for a new license if you want to process it i can do it online for you now.

Old dude: okay its only 9 bucks hands over credit card number (facepalm)

Currybreath: Comes back a couple minutes later and says sir sorry your card has been declined do you have another card we can try.

Old dude: at this point realizes something is fucked up because has 10k limit on card and nothing at all on it, pays off bill every month in full. Tells curry i will go find my other card hang on a minute. Grabs his mobile and calls the bank to ask why his credit card just got declined for $9. They tell him they have just charged it for $288 its a scam immediately go disconnect your modem

:rolled

[Jayjami]

They have called me a couple of times. I enjoy fucking with them, taking up their time. My favorite is when they ask for my credit card info. I give them the name Jack Meoff, and ask them to repeat it back to me several times to make sure they have it correct.

[Belly Buster]

I've had these calls before, so a bit of scambaiting was fairly easy. I'm really tempted to set up a burner virtual machine ready for a future call to see what shit these guys actually do. Sadly the call didn't record - it was too long!

First off Gupta knows my name (not hard - I'm the directory). He says he's from "windows support". Hackers have been attacking my computer for the last 2 weeks and this has been reported to them. My computer is 2 hours away from having all the data wiped. I naturally sound concerned.

First ruse is to prove you've got problems. He get's me to run eventvwr.exe and look at the administrator logs. Of course this has tons of errors and warnings like it always has. Gupta asks how many errors are shown, so I say 3,190. He comes back with there should only be 25 at the most. Of course I know this is horseshit, but a non-techy might fall for it.

So now he asks me to run www.apx123.webs.com and it brings up some jank website. The homepage has a bunch of links to various remote control tools.

He tries to get me to download the first one www.ammyy.com. I dick him around with getting stuck on the UAC. On the PC I let the kids use, I have it set so that you need an admin password to install anything. I just pretended I didn't know the password. After three failed attempts, and few times of pressing cancel, Gupta goes on tilt and puts me on hold.

Then a different indian guy comes on - similar but definitely different (the first guy was quite a bit easier to understand). I ask him if it is the same person, and he insists it is - he says his voice sounds different "because he's got a different headset" LOL.

I fuck this guy around for 5 minutes more. After which time, as all good tech support people do, he decides I need a reboot to clear the error. So I pretend to reboot. After 5 more minutes the new guy (let's call him Dikshit) asks what is on the screen, so I say "Updating windows - installing update 3 of 45" I keep him on the phone for 15 minutes just waiting for the pretend windows updates to finish. He makes small talk.

So after the "reboot" Dikshit then tells me to go to www.support.me. When saying .me he says "M for Microsoft, E for Engineer". I ask if he is from Microsoft, and he says no, Microsoft don't provide this level of support. You only get this support from his specialist support.

www.support.me is a legit site run by logmein. You use a 6 digit token to connect the support guy to the end user. After deliberately getting the code wrong about 8 times, the guy is now on full-blown monkey tilt, so at the next attempt I put in the right code just to keep him playing. However, the tightwad indians only signed up for a trial account, which then proceeds to display a shit ton of warnings not to accept unsolicited support calls. Dikshit is now begging me to just hit the OK button, but I just keep reading the warning page at him, saying "but it tells me I shouldn't accept unsolicited support calls". After 5 more minutes of dicking him about, he hangs up.

[bukowski72]

I got one of those fix your credit cards calls a couple minutes after Bovada disconnected me from a $100 DON when there were only 4 players left so i was in a very bad mood. Instead of saying why would i take credit help from someone who is breaking the law by calling me, I said why don't you go suck your mother's dick. She went off confirming my address and warning me. I hung up and she called back to threaten me. I was a little freaked out worrying she could slip something into my credit report or fuck with me in another way, but nothing ever came of it. i was worried for a couple of weeks.

I was working on an e-mail complaining to Bovada about the disconnection and an obvious case of collusion when I noticed I had won. One of the guys had been forced to go all in because of the large blinds and had lost before i got blinded out.

[simpdog]

I've had these calls before, so a bit of scambaiting was fairly easy. I'm really tempted to set up a burner virtual machine ready for a future call to see what shit these guys actually do. Sadly the call didn't record - it was too long!

First off Gupta knows my name (not hard - I'm the directory). He says he's from "windows support". Hackers have been attacking my computer for the last 2 weeks and this has been reported to them. My computer is 2 hours away from having all the data wiped. I naturally sound concerned.

First ruse is to prove you've got problems. He get's me to run eventvwr.exe and look at the administrator logs. Of course this has tons of errors and warnings like it always has. Gupta asks how many errors are shown, so I say 3,190. He comes back with there should only be 25 at the most. Of course I know this is horseshit, but a non-techy might fall for it.

So now he asks me to run www.apx123.webs.com and it brings up some jank website. The homepage has a bunch of links to various remote control tools.

He tries to get me to download the first one www.ammyy.com. I dick him around with getting stuck on the UAC. On the PC I let the kids use, I have it set so that you need an admin password to install anything. I just pretended I didn't know the password. After three failed attempts, and few times of pressing cancel, Gupta goes on tilt and puts me on hold.

Then a different indian guy comes on - similar but definitely different (the first guy was quite a bit easier to understand). I ask him if it is the same person, and he insists it is - he says his voice sounds different "because he's got a different headset" LOL.

I fuck this guy around for 5 minutes more. After which time, as all good tech support people do, he decides I need a reboot to clear the error. So I pretend to reboot. After 5 more minutes the new guy (let's call him Dikshit) asks what is on the screen, so I say "Updating windows - installing update 3 of 45" I keep him on the phone for 15 minutes just waiting for the pretend windows updates to finish. He makes small talk.

So after the "reboot" Dikshit then tells me to go to www.support.me. When saying .me he says "M for Microsoft, E for Engineer". I ask if he is from Microsoft, and he says no, Microsoft don't provide this level of support. You only get this support from his specialist support.

www.support.me is a legit site run by logmein. You use a 6 digit token to connect the support guy to the end user. After deliberately getting the code wrong about 8 times, the guy is now on full-blown monkey tilt, so at the next attempt I put in the right code just to keep him playing. However, the tightwad indians only signed up for a trial account, which then proceeds to display a shit ton of warnings not to accept unsolicited support calls. Dikshit is now begging me to just hit the OK button, but I just keep reading the warning page at him, saying "but it tells me I shouldn't accept unsolicited support calls". After 5 more minutes of dicking him about, he hangs up.

Worth reading two times. The first time I almost pissed my pants.

[handicapme]

When Todd gets rid of the super AIDS he should make this prank call using Chico Loco. I believe he did it back in the NWP/DD days, but can't remember.

[phantom]

I'm really tempted to set up a burner virtual machine ready for a future call to see what shit these guys actually do.

good idea i might actually do this.

and transfer a copy of my bestiality collection to it and of course put a collage of horse dick pictures as my wallpaper. then let them log in for lols

[Belly Buster]

I'm really tempted to set up a burner virtual machine ready for a future call to see what shit these guys actually do.

good idea i might actually do this.

and transfer a copy of my bestiality collection to it and of course put a collage of horse dick pictures as my wallpaper. then let them log in for lols

Ha yes - sure there's some shit that is really offensive to indians that you could add as well. Bacon? Pakistani flags? Women with their ankles showing?

[phantom]

might go with sachin tendulkar photoshopped getting a bukkake

[Daly]

http://www.419eater.com

One of my favorite websites, although the content is a little stale. This guy reverse scams Nigerian e-mailers. I literally got in trouble at work a few years ago because I spent an entire work week on this site.

[Belly Buster]

http://www.419eater.com

One of my favorite websites, although the content is a little stale. This guy reverse scams Nigerian e-mailers. I literally got in trouble at work a few years ago because I spent an entire work week on this site.

There's stale, and there's 8 years without any updates. In it's time though this was a quality site.