Master Scalir update

[Dan Druff]

As some of you know, he pretty much lives for the Coachella Music Festival, which runs two consecutive weekends every year in April.

I had to buy his two tickets for him ($330 each) many months in advance, because it sells out, and he didn't have a credit card to make the purchase. He paid me back eventually.

But that's not really the story here.

The first weekend took place from April 13-15, and everything went fine. He stayed in a motel with someone he has known since 1994, and he has gone with this person for several years in a row. They have opposite tastes in music, so they don't hang out there, but they split costs and he is also provided with transportation to and from the event (which is about 120 miles from where he lives).

The first weekend went off without a hitch.

However, this person had no desire to go with him for the second weekend, as they weren't as dedicated to Coachella as Ken.

This is the first year where they're doing two weekends of Coachella, whereas previous years it was only one, so this issue hadn't come up before.

Ken had two problems he had to overcome in order to make the second weekend work:

1) He needed transportation to and from the event

2) He needed someone else to pay for half the motel room

He solved #1 by taking the Greyhound bus.

However, he was having a real hard time finding someone to share the motel with him, and he finally found a girl in her 30s from the internet to agree to do so.

This girl had never met him before, nor had she seen a picture of him...



... and apparently she was a bit concerned about staying alone in a motel room with a man she didn't know. Ken assured her that he was harmless and that everything would be fine, but I knew it wouldn't work out. Obviously his appearance would be very unnerving to a girl that didn't know him, and she would be unlikely to feel comfortable with him.

That's exactly what happened. The girl was VERY uncomfortable around him, and I guess he said something to really make her nervous (I don't know exactly what it was), and she bailed on him after the first night. He was still on the hook for two more nights, and now didn't have a roommate to split the bill.

He then went into panic mode and started calling everyone, including me, begging for money. I wasn't awake to answer the call, as I had caught a mild cold from Benjamin and went to sleep unusually early that night.

However, before the roommate situation went sour, she gave him several cookies that she had brought down for the show. Ken didn't bother to ask what was in the cookies, and just naively assumed that she liked cookies and brought them for a snack.

He ate five of them.



Apparently they were full of marijuana and God knows what else, and he ended up fainting while in line that morning to get into the show. They took him to the first aid tent, and he was so out of it that he didn't recover until 5pm, and missed most of the concerts he wanted to see that day.

He somehow scrounged up enough money to pay the remaning hotel bill and return to LA on the Greyhound, and is now safely at home, though very disappointed that he missed a large part of one of the days.

He gave me permission to tell this story, so don't Yebknife me.



Thought some of you might be interested.

[neveragain39]

Ken is a very unique individual, and he is also very knowledgeable about new music.
Ken would make a good radio segment guest provided these segments are brief (15 minutes or so tops).

I had some of the space brownies in amsterdam one time but I stayed awake and I felt terrific the remainder of the evening.

[Dan Druff]

Ken is a very unique individual, and he is also very knowledgeable about new music.
Ken would make a good radio segment guest provided these segments are brief (15 minutes or so tops).

I had some of the space brownies in amsterdam one time but I stayed awake and I felt terrific the remainder of the evening.

I think some of his reaction probably had to do with the fact that he never does drugs.

Also perhaps the stuff in the cookies was pretty powerful.

Or both.

[Bootsy Collins]

Will Master Scalir be attending the KROQ Weenie Roast? I will be in attendance and if he is there I will be on the lookout for him.

[Baron Von Strucker]

Ken is GOD

Whe he comes at you for a handshake do you fake him out and go for the fist pump instead?

[BCR]

I've never been a big fan of Scalir calls or anecdotes, other than the TV appearances, which were gold, but this line alone,

"He ate five of them."

makes all those annoying pay phone calls on DD radio almost worth it. Genuine belly laugh on that, as I could literally picture him reeling, confused, and totally mind-fucked as to what was occurring to him. I can even imagine the disbelieving glances among the first aid staff when Scalir, looking every bit the disheveled addict, tells them he didn't know that he ingested anything.

[DRK Star]

as a Festival Veteran, you NEVER eat cookies/brownies/gooballs from strangers without IMMEDIATELY ASSUMING they are laced/baked with something that will fuck you up.

I thought this guy goes to Coachella every year. How does he NOT know not to eat strange food?!


just looking at that guy, I assumed he was a junkie who is constantly spun on some acid/molly. Cant believe he isnt, unless its due to lack of funds. Guy looks sketch enough to sell drugs in the lot...custies would believe his shit is legit.

[DRK Star]

Also, its ALWAYS a good idea to buy said brownies/cookies/gooballs from anyone selling them in the lot utilizing a WICKER BASKET.


WICKER BASKETS are the global sign for "Powerful Drugs in these baked goods"

[Steve-O]

Should have sold the cookies, problem solved

[Jasep]

Why doesn't he have a credit/debit/access to prepaid visa, paypal or anything else like that at his age?

That seems odd to me..

Also by the looks of him he could sell fake drugs all weekend and not only would people line up for them, they would probably think they were mega high just based on the source they bought from

[zealanddonk]

Why doesn't he have a credit/debit/access to prepaid visa, paypal or anything else like that at his age?

That seems odd to me..

Also by the looks of him he could sell fake drugs all weekend and not only would people line up for them, they would probably think they were mega high just based on the source they bought from

Micon already playing fake poker with fake money, selling fake drugs for fake money cant be too far down the silk road at this rate.

and Druff, good update, Master Scalir's shenanigans are always interesting in small doses.

[Fergie72]

What I want to know is, where did he plan to take care of business when the inevitable "brimming" occurred from seeing all the pretty girls at the festival? His roomie probably bailed because she heard him furiously masturbating in the bathroom!

[ErickAA]

Ken is a very unique individual, and he is also very knowledgeable about new music.
Ken would make a good radio segment guest provided these segments are brief (15 minutes or so tops).

He is KROQ Ken that calls into the Kevin and Bean show, right? I used to listen to that show a lot when I had a long drive during morning hours. I vaguely remember him calling into the show, but this was pre NWP days, so didn't mean anything to me at the time.

I still listen to Kevin and Bean, but my commute is only like 10 minutes now. I actually try to time my commute to listen to the show biz beat with Ralph. I actually think Ralph is carrying the show now, and only a matter of time before he takes over for Kevin full time.