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    Uncomfortable Question

    I have dated this gal for a few months now and we have made some inroads and all.

    But the last couple weeks have been uncomfortable for me.

    First, I have never had anyone been so neat around me. She basically straightens everything out for me, including doing my laundry. She even bought a bunch of groceries for me the other day, and tossed the things I knew I would never eat. And she is nice looking, not some pig or anything like that. She makes about $90K a year.

    So a couple weeks ago I am pretty horny about 9am Sunday and I have to take a huge shit. Problem is she is in the master shower taking a shower, so I am stuck. My shower is small so the whole twosome would not work anyway, but it does not matter anyway as I have to drop a steamer. So I make my way downstairs to the half bathroom. I faintly remember my girlfriend getting out of bed earlier that night and she went downstairs.

    So I go to sit down and I see a tiny piece of toilet paper wedged underneath the seat. Now, I had just thoroughly cleaned that toilet earlier in the day, so I know it was spotless. When I lifted up the seat, WTF, it was fucking coated with splatter. I surmised she went down there and just took a huge wine-shit so she would not be embarrassed by the noise. That is fine. But to leave that splatter for me to see?

    It was fucking disgusting. I can probably block it out, but if it happens again, I need to know what to say.

    Keep in mind, when I nuke out a shit at anyone's house, I always give the courtesy wipe (unless it's in a public bathroom which I rarely use).

    By the way, I retired PHA

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    Plutonium sonatine's Avatar
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    Big McIntosh was trotting down the street, whistling contently. He had reason to be cheerful he thought. After months of building up the nerve to speak up to the beautiful mare of his dreams, he finally just did it. No plan. Just a talk, to have some company in what else would be another lonely night for her. And she seemed like she had enjoyed the uncomplicated small talk too.

    It all started a few weeks ago, when he couldn’t sleep. He had watched out his window, gazing over the apple family farm. Then, he saw how the moon cast the acres of the ranch in a soft, restful glow, its sight unappreciated by most ponies. Only the nocturnal animals seemed to enjoy the beautiful night. He decided to take a stroll over the acres, deciding that sleeping while the night was so splendid would be a waste. He planned to go to ponytown and back, since that route was easy to find your way back, even if the moon would have hidden itself behind a stray cloud.

    And there, in the night, just outside the property of the Apple family, he saw her.

    She took his breath away at first sight. The rays of the moon straddled her firm rump, accentuating the curves of her slender body. Her mane almost shone with a light of its own when the light hit the light strands. He felt his heart straining to get free for his chest while gazing unto pure beauty.

    Then she looked at him and he was powerless. His legs almost gave way while gazing into her deep eyes that had seen much, and every event those eyes had witnessed had rubbed off something mysterious on them.

    He had only dared to nod to her as politely as he could, while his body was aflame. When he passed, she seemed… he couldn’t quite tell… almost disappointed maybe? Then he had returned to the farm, and went back to sleep.



    The next night, he went for a walk again. Without meaning to run into her again of course, or so he told himself. When he indeed didn’t see her, his heart sank a bit.

    And then, when he turned around on the road to walk back to his bed, he saw her again. This time he dared to greet her with a bow, while again feeling the heat of desire swelling up into his body while inspecting how the light shone on her perfect fur. He had seen her a few times before of course, but from afar, and without the moon bringing forth the beauty of her.

    It wasn’t so that she was not attractive during the day, far from it. But it was clear that during the night she was in her element.

    While he greeted her with a short bow, she surprised him by asking: “Beautiful night, isn’t it?”.

    He choked on his words, and simply said “Eeyup”.

    She looked at him, with a certain sadness in her deep eyes. “A pity most ponies don’t appreciate it”

    And while he answered with another affirmative neigh, she walked away, leaving him with his heart pumping.



    After that, every night for the last two months Big Mac had taken a stroll on that road. And every night he “coincidently” had run into Princess Luna. Every night the conversations grew a bit longer, even though she was unsure how to talk to ponies in this day and age, and he was incurable shy.



    So, after those two months, Big Mac was walking that same road again, hoping to maybe ask the Princess out for a date of some kind. He subconsciously knew that simple farm ponies weren’t supposed to interact so freely with royalty, but he told himself that since she was quite obviously not rejecting any advances from his side, possibly even welcoming them, that it wouldn’t matter.

    He would see where it would take him, consequences be damned, he thought.

    Then he looked up to the moon and froze.







    The castle guards suddenly were jolted awake from their half sleeping state by the sound of hooves on the road leading to the bridge. They immediately, as they were trained to do, stood in front of the gate to halt the colt running up to them.

    “Let him pass, I’ve been expecting him…” They suddenly heard a voice behind them say.

    They kneeled on their front legs, and obeyed Princess Celestia by standing aside and letting Big McIntosh through.

    Big Mac saw the person he came to see, and stopped dead in his tracks when he had passed the guards.

    “Princess, what happened to L… princess Luna? I see her silhouette in the moon again!” He neighed.

    “There must be a mistake!”

    “No. No mistake. It’s more like a measure to prevent a mistake” Princess Celestia said dejectedly while looking down on her hoofs. Big Mac had never seen her like this.

    “I’m sorry, princess, but what do you mean?” He asked, his heart thumping from anxiety.

    “Come with me.” She simply said.







    In the throne room, the two ponies were alone. Big Mac realized that this was highly unorthodox. Even Twilight wouldn’t get an audience alone with the princess so easily.

    Then the princess looked him in the eyes, and he couldn’t suppress a shudder. There was something cold in those eyes. Where Luna’s eyes tended to radiate some soft glow of their own when she started to warm up to Mac, Mac only saw hate in the eyes of her older sister.

    “Ehhm… Princess…” he began, wondering where this sudden coldness for him came from. He had never spoken with the princess for longer than a few minutes.

    “Do you know how long a thousand year is?” she interrupted.

    Big Macintosh was taken by surprise. He felt something was off here. He pondered on what answer she expected, and what answer she could potentially want. He decided to go for the obvious answer.

    “Pretty long, Ah guess?” his voice trailed off while looking in the cold, dark stare of the princess.

    “Quite wrong. ” she said softly. “For us immortals it’s no more than the blink of an eye. We measure seconds by the changes of the seasons, days by the eroding of the hills, months by the movement of continents and YEARS BY THE DYING OF SUNS.” Her voice rose to a crescendo.

    “Can you imagine that, little pony?” she said suddenly very soft again. “Can you imagine taking a breath, exhaling it, and when you finished, all ponies you know now are withered up and dead? Of course you can’t. Only true immortals can.” She answered her own question.

    “Ah don’t understand what exactly this has to do with…” Big Macintosh started timidly.

    Celestia gave a shrill laugh. “You don’t understand? Of course you don’t, stupid brickhead! How did you imagine how this story would end? You and Luna having some dates, becoming a couple, fool around a bit, everyone IS HAPPY?!” She almost spit the last words out.

    “Let me tell you how it would end, silly pony.” She gave him another stare that could cool down supernovas. “You and Luna have some dates. Maybe you become a couple. You fool around a bit, everyone is happy.” She took a breath. “Then you die. In a blink of an eye in her perspective. Leaving her with only the memories. And regrets.”

    She looked like suddenly all air left her, leaving her a tired shell of her normal vibrant self, while she thought back to the conversation she had had with her sister a few hours before. She had sounded so upbeat and full of joy when talking about this stallion... She actually had mentioned she hoped he would be interested in taking it further. Princess Celestia just had to intervene to prevent her sister's heart shattering, even if it meant breaking it in two. Swift, decisive action was required before this pony wormed his way into Luna's heart even further.

    She cleared her throat and continued. “So, I had to intervene. I banished her, yes. For a thousand years. An amount mortal ponies might call cruel. But she will close her eyes and open them, only having blinked once, and in that time her sentence will have ended and she will already be allowed to return. And she will have forgotten all about an already long dead pony she thought she loved. In the end, she will understand I did it for her own good.”

    The last sentence was spoken more to herself than to the colt before her.

    Then, her brooding was suddenly interrupted by a simple statement of that very colt.“That’s a load of bull.”

    She looked up and saw him. Her anger could be felt in the throne room, heat radiating of her when she even channeled only a bit of the power under her command.

    “You dare to question my judgment, little pony?” she hissed. “Maybe you’re right, and I shouldn’t have banished her. I could’ve banished you instead, which would also solve our conundrum, right?” she smiled without any mirth behind it.

    BigMacintosh locked his strong legs into place. He would not leave princess Luna to her fate, even though this might turn pretty ugly for him quite soon.

    “Don’t you think she should be allowed to make her own mistakes?” he inquired.

    Princess Celestia looked at him in shock “Why would I have to let her make mistakes I can prevent? There’s no way that a mortal lifespan of pleasure is worth an immortal lifetime of regrets.”

    “What if it is?” he asked boldy. “I would die after what seems to her only a moment, I realize that. But what if I can make that infinitesimal amount of time count?”

    Princess Celestia looked him up and down. “Prove it.” She simply said.



    Big Mac felt the sweat running down his back through his fur. He gave another mighty heave and inched his massive cock further into the princess. She felt it sliding inside her, feeling fuller than she ever experienced with the guards she “invited” to “entertain” her. She grunted, raising her hindquarters a bit to increase the pleasure. She hadn’t expected that the colt would prove to be so talented!

    Big mac, on the other hand, was enjoying himself a lot less. While the physical part was of course heavenly, his guilt quenched the joy a great deal.

    He sniffed Celestia’s hair, and pressed his guilty thoughts aside. This was the only way to be ever together with Luna. They had started as animals on the floor, her behaving not quite as a princess should, and he unsure of what to do.

    But when she took his dick into her mouth and started sucking, his body took over, and his mind took a backseat. She caressed his balls and alternatively sucked and licked on his shaft. She took it deep in her throat, moving it in and out with fluid movements, and he almost came there and then.

    But that would mean the moment would be over too soon, proving to Celestia she was right, so he (barely) kept himself in check.

    While she was still busy with his member, he began stroking his hoof over her curves, pondering she and her sister looked quite alike. He traced the lines of her body, until he reached her sensitive areas.

    She stopped sucking him off, and smiled. “You aren’t going to make it easy for me, are you?”

    “Nnnope.”

    She then turned over completely, putting her face close to his. “Then show me what you can do, pony boy”, she teased.

    He moved his hoof back to her pussy and began to stroke it while stroking her spine with his other hoof, and nibbling her neck tentatively. She began to groan, and when he rubbed the top of his cock on her clitoris, she began to moan. He then put it in, and began heaving.



    He still rubbed his hooves over the sensitive parts of her body, even when working his massive girth in her body. Celestias whole body was tingling while Big Mac was rutting tirelessly, stretching her pussy. She started to leak already some precum. She waved her horn, and Big Mac felt his throat clench a bit. His lungs had to work harder so supply every important part with sufficient amounts of oxygen, making him out of breath. He then moved his hooves to the horn of the princess, and began to stroke it with his hooves. He rolled Celestia over from doggy style to the missionary position and looked her into her eyes, then kissed her.

    She opened her eyes wide while being assaulted by the feel of his cock sliding up and down, rubbing her clit in the process, the tongue being forced into her throat and the sensual feeling of her horn being rubbed expertly.

    Big Mac coughed while her concentration snapped and he could take a full breath again. The oxygen rushing to his brain gave him so much pleasure he just couldn’t hold it anymore. He blew his load deep inside the princess.

    She gasped of pleasure when she felt the cool cum jetting out of his dick inside her. He then looked in her eyes again, and began teasing her clit with his hoof again while curving his tongue around her horn. After a few minutes, he was rewarded by copious love juices flowing from her hindquarters. For a second, all the princess’s muscles went slack, her pupils dilated and she stared into depths only she could see. He looked at her expectedly after they had just lied on the floor for a few minutes.

    “Maybe… maybe you’re right.” She whispered while she tried to keep the intense feeling she just had. “Maybe it’s true you should just damn the consequences and enjoy those precious little moments. But I’m still not sure.” That last sentence was said with a teasing glance.

    Big Mac smiled. “Then I’d better make another effort to argue my case, my dear princess…” and kissed her again, ready for another cycle.



    “Luna!” bellowed Big Mac while he saw the slender form running away again.

    She had known as soon as she had seen him again of course. His body language had spoken of his massive guilt, and she could smell her sister all over him. He hadn’t even tried to explain, because how could he ever? “Hey girl, I fucked your sister all over the palace in any way I could think of because I love you?” Yeah, right.

    He thought that being seperated for a thousands years was horrible, but being so close but so far apart was even worse.

    He neighed one more time her name at his top volume, but soon she was only a speck in the distance, galloping away over the horizon. He fell to the road and let his tears fly.
    "Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness." - Alejandro Jodorowsky

    "America is not so much a nightmare as a non-dream. The American non-dream is precisely a move to wipe the dream out of existence. The dream is a spontaneous happening and therefore dangerous to a control system set up by the non-dreamers." -- William S. Burroughs

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    Plutonium sonatine's Avatar
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    "Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness." - Alejandro Jodorowsky

    "America is not so much a nightmare as a non-dream. The American non-dream is precisely a move to wipe the dream out of existence. The dream is a spontaneous happening and therefore dangerous to a control system set up by the non-dreamers." -- William S. Burroughs

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    Diamond Walter Sobchak's Avatar
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    Given that $90K is at least triple your income and will allow you to keep a steady supply of bathtub hooch, I think you should put up with an occasional splatter.

    SOBCHAK SECURITY 213-799-7798

    PRESIDENT JOSEPH R. BIDEN JR., THE GREAT AND POWERFUL

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    ** SCAMMER ** Lannister's Avatar
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    The fact that you're very poor should make you not have any problems whatsoever with a girl that makes 90k a year.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sonatine View Post
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    my cheeks

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    Quote Originally Posted by sonatine View Post
    Big McIntosh was trotting down the street, whistling contently. He had reason to be cheerful he thought. After months of building up the nerve to speak up to the beautiful mare of his dreams, he finally just did it. No plan. Just a talk, to have some company in what else would be another lonely night for her. And she seemed like she had enjoyed the uncomplicated small talk too.

    It all started a few weeks ago, when he couldn’t sleep. He had watched out his window, gazing over the apple family farm. Then, he saw how the moon cast the acres of the ranch in a soft, restful glow, its sight unappreciated by most ponies. Only the nocturnal animals seemed to enjoy the beautiful night. He decided to take a stroll over the acres, deciding that sleeping while the night was so splendid would be a waste. He planned to go to ponytown and back, since that route was easy to find your way back, even if the moon would have hidden itself behind a stray cloud.

    And there, in the night, just outside the property of the Apple family, he saw her.

    She took his breath away at first sight. The rays of the moon straddled her firm rump, accentuating the curves of her slender body. Her mane almost shone with a light of its own when the light hit the light strands. He felt his heart straining to get free for his chest while gazing unto pure beauty.

    Then she looked at him and he was powerless. His legs almost gave way while gazing into her deep eyes that had seen much, and every event those eyes had witnessed had rubbed off something mysterious on them.

    He had only dared to nod to her as politely as he could, while his body was aflame. When he passed, she seemed… he couldn’t quite tell… almost disappointed maybe? Then he had returned to the farm, and went back to sleep.



    The next night, he went for a walk again. Without meaning to run into her again of course, or so he told himself. When he indeed didn’t see her, his heart sank a bit.

    And then, when he turned around on the road to walk back to his bed, he saw her again. This time he dared to greet her with a bow, while again feeling the heat of desire swelling up into his body while inspecting how the light shone on her perfect fur. He had seen her a few times before of course, but from afar, and without the moon bringing forth the beauty of her.

    It wasn’t so that she was not attractive during the day, far from it. But it was clear that during the night she was in her element.

    While he greeted her with a short bow, she surprised him by asking: “Beautiful night, isn’t it?”.

    He choked on his words, and simply said “Eeyup”.

    She looked at him, with a certain sadness in her deep eyes. “A pity most ponies don’t appreciate it”

    And while he answered with another affirmative neigh, she walked away, leaving him with his heart pumping.



    After that, every night for the last two months Big Mac had taken a stroll on that road. And every night he “coincidently” had run into Princess Luna. Every night the conversations grew a bit longer, even though she was unsure how to talk to ponies in this day and age, and he was incurable shy.



    So, after those two months, Big Mac was walking that same road again, hoping to maybe ask the Princess out for a date of some kind. He subconsciously knew that simple farm ponies weren’t supposed to interact so freely with royalty, but he told himself that since she was quite obviously not rejecting any advances from his side, possibly even welcoming them, that it wouldn’t matter.

    He would see where it would take him, consequences be damned, he thought.

    Then he looked up to the moon and froze.







    The castle guards suddenly were jolted awake from their half sleeping state by the sound of hooves on the road leading to the bridge. They immediately, as they were trained to do, stood in front of the gate to halt the colt running up to them.

    “Let him pass, I’ve been expecting him…” They suddenly heard a voice behind them say.

    They kneeled on their front legs, and obeyed Princess Celestia by standing aside and letting Big McIntosh through.

    Big Mac saw the person he came to see, and stopped dead in his tracks when he had passed the guards.

    “Princess, what happened to L… princess Luna? I see her silhouette in the moon again!” He neighed.

    “There must be a mistake!”

    “No. No mistake. It’s more like a measure to prevent a mistake” Princess Celestia said dejectedly while looking down on her hoofs. Big Mac had never seen her like this.

    “I’m sorry, princess, but what do you mean?” He asked, his heart thumping from anxiety.

    “Come with me.” She simply said.







    In the throne room, the two ponies were alone. Big Mac realized that this was highly unorthodox. Even Twilight wouldn’t get an audience alone with the princess so easily.

    Then the princess looked him in the eyes, and he couldn’t suppress a shudder. There was something cold in those eyes. Where Luna’s eyes tended to radiate some soft glow of their own when she started to warm up to Mac, Mac only saw hate in the eyes of her older sister.

    “Ehhm… Princess…” he began, wondering where this sudden coldness for him came from. He had never spoken with the princess for longer than a few minutes.

    “Do you know how long a thousand year is?” she interrupted.

    Big Macintosh was taken by surprise. He felt something was off here. He pondered on what answer she expected, and what answer she could potentially want. He decided to go for the obvious answer.

    “Pretty long, Ah guess?” his voice trailed off while looking in the cold, dark stare of the princess.

    “Quite wrong. ” she said softly. “For us immortals it’s no more than the blink of an eye. We measure seconds by the changes of the seasons, days by the eroding of the hills, months by the movement of continents and YEARS BY THE DYING OF SUNS.” Her voice rose to a crescendo.

    “Can you imagine that, little pony?” she said suddenly very soft again. “Can you imagine taking a breath, exhaling it, and when you finished, all ponies you know now are withered up and dead? Of course you can’t. Only true immortals can.” She answered her own question.

    “Ah don’t understand what exactly this has to do with…” Big Macintosh started timidly.

    Celestia gave a shrill laugh. “You don’t understand? Of course you don’t, stupid brickhead! How did you imagine how this story would end? You and Luna having some dates, becoming a couple, fool around a bit, everyone IS HAPPY?!” She almost spit the last words out.

    “Let me tell you how it would end, silly pony.” She gave him another stare that could cool down supernovas. “You and Luna have some dates. Maybe you become a couple. You fool around a bit, everyone is happy.” She took a breath. “Then you die. In a blink of an eye in her perspective. Leaving her with only the memories. And regrets.”

    She looked like suddenly all air left her, leaving her a tired shell of her normal vibrant self, while she thought back to the conversation she had had with her sister a few hours before. She had sounded so upbeat and full of joy when talking about this stallion... She actually had mentioned she hoped he would be interested in taking it further. Princess Celestia just had to intervene to prevent her sister's heart shattering, even if it meant breaking it in two. Swift, decisive action was required before this pony wormed his way into Luna's heart even further.

    She cleared her throat and continued. “So, I had to intervene. I banished her, yes. For a thousand years. An amount mortal ponies might call cruel. But she will close her eyes and open them, only having blinked once, and in that time her sentence will have ended and she will already be allowed to return. And she will have forgotten all about an already long dead pony she thought she loved. In the end, she will understand I did it for her own good.”

    The last sentence was spoken more to herself than to the colt before her.

    Then, her brooding was suddenly interrupted by a simple statement of that very colt.“That’s a load of bull.”

    She looked up and saw him. Her anger could be felt in the throne room, heat radiating of her when she even channeled only a bit of the power under her command.

    “You dare to question my judgment, little pony?” she hissed. “Maybe you’re right, and I shouldn’t have banished her. I could’ve banished you instead, which would also solve our conundrum, right?” she smiled without any mirth behind it.

    BigMacintosh locked his strong legs into place. He would not leave princess Luna to her fate, even though this might turn pretty ugly for him quite soon.

    “Don’t you think she should be allowed to make her own mistakes?” he inquired.

    Princess Celestia looked at him in shock “Why would I have to let her make mistakes I can prevent? There’s no way that a mortal lifespan of pleasure is worth an immortal lifetime of regrets.”

    “What if it is?” he asked boldy. “I would die after what seems to her only a moment, I realize that. But what if I can make that infinitesimal amount of time count?”

    Princess Celestia looked him up and down. “Prove it.” She simply said.



    Big Mac felt the sweat running down his back through his fur. He gave another mighty heave and inched his massive cock further into the princess. She felt it sliding inside her, feeling fuller than she ever experienced with the guards she “invited” to “entertain” her. She grunted, raising her hindquarters a bit to increase the pleasure. She hadn’t expected that the colt would prove to be so talented!

    Big mac, on the other hand, was enjoying himself a lot less. While the physical part was of course heavenly, his guilt quenched the joy a great deal.

    He sniffed Celestia’s hair, and pressed his guilty thoughts aside. This was the only way to be ever together with Luna. They had started as animals on the floor, her behaving not quite as a princess should, and he unsure of what to do.

    But when she took his dick into her mouth and started sucking, his body took over, and his mind took a backseat. She caressed his balls and alternatively sucked and licked on his shaft. She took it deep in her throat, moving it in and out with fluid movements, and he almost came there and then.

    But that would mean the moment would be over too soon, proving to Celestia she was right, so he (barely) kept himself in check.

    While she was still busy with his member, he began stroking his hoof over her curves, pondering she and her sister looked quite alike. He traced the lines of her body, until he reached her sensitive areas.

    She stopped sucking him off, and smiled. “You aren’t going to make it easy for me, are you?”

    “Nnnope.”

    She then turned over completely, putting her face close to his. “Then show me what you can do, pony boy”, she teased.

    He moved his hoof back to her pussy and began to stroke it while stroking her spine with his other hoof, and nibbling her neck tentatively. She began to groan, and when he rubbed the top of his cock on her clitoris, she began to moan. He then put it in, and began heaving.



    He still rubbed his hooves over the sensitive parts of her body, even when working his massive girth in her body. Celestias whole body was tingling while Big Mac was rutting tirelessly, stretching her pussy. She started to leak already some precum. She waved her horn, and Big Mac felt his throat clench a bit. His lungs had to work harder so supply every important part with sufficient amounts of oxygen, making him out of breath. He then moved his hooves to the horn of the princess, and began to stroke it with his hooves. He rolled Celestia over from doggy style to the missionary position and looked her into her eyes, then kissed her.

    She opened her eyes wide while being assaulted by the feel of his cock sliding up and down, rubbing her clit in the process, the tongue being forced into her throat and the sensual feeling of her horn being rubbed expertly.

    Big Mac coughed while her concentration snapped and he could take a full breath again. The oxygen rushing to his brain gave him so much pleasure he just couldn’t hold it anymore. He blew his load deep inside the princess.

    She gasped of pleasure when she felt the cool cum jetting out of his dick inside her. He then looked in her eyes again, and began teasing her clit with his hoof again while curving his tongue around her horn. After a few minutes, he was rewarded by copious love juices flowing from her hindquarters. For a second, all the princess’s muscles went slack, her pupils dilated and she stared into depths only she could see. He looked at her expectedly after they had just lied on the floor for a few minutes.

    “Maybe… maybe you’re right.” She whispered while she tried to keep the intense feeling she just had. “Maybe it’s true you should just damn the consequences and enjoy those precious little moments. But I’m still not sure.” That last sentence was said with a teasing glance.

    Big Mac smiled. “Then I’d better make another effort to argue my case, my dear princess…” and kissed her again, ready for another cycle.



    “Luna!” bellowed Big Mac while he saw the slender form running away again.

    She had known as soon as she had seen him again of course. His body language had spoken of his massive guilt, and she could smell her sister all over him. He hadn’t even tried to explain, because how could he ever? “Hey girl, I fucked your sister all over the palace in any way I could think of because I love you?” Yeah, right.

    He thought that being seperated for a thousands years was horrible, but being so close but so far apart was even worse.

    He neighed one more time her name at his top volume, but soon she was only a speck in the distance, galloping away over the horizon. He fell to the road and let his tears fly.
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  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ryback_feed_me_more View Post
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    How about we kick anybody in the nuts that quotes an entire extrememly long post so they can complain that somebody posted the original extremely long post.
    (•_•) ..
    ∫\ \___( •_•)
    _∫∫ _∫∫ɯ \ \

    Quote Originally Posted by Hockey Guy
    I'd say good luck in the freeroll but I'm pretty sure you'll go on a bender to self-sabotage yourself & miss it completely or use it as the excuse of why you didn't cash.

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    Gold Deal's Avatar
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    Cool Story, have you seen her dick yet?
    Quote Originally Posted by Jasep View Post
    I have always tried to carry myself with a high level of integrity in the poker community and I take it very personally when someone calls that in to question.

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    Cubic Zirconia donk_tilt7.0Alpha's Avatar
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    gRoss. I personally wouldn't date a girl that takes shits, but that's just me.

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    Platinum nunbeater's Avatar
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    bottomset it is not an uncomfortable question. When a guy gets horny every time he shits it just means he enjoys a big fat cock in the rectum. Nothing to be awkward about buddy, we're not here to judge you on your sexuality.

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    Bronze Buck Nasty's Avatar
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    If she would just do the splatter on you instead of the toilet that would make her a keeper.

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    Diamond vegas1369's Avatar
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    Serious question... Are you sure you didn't do this yourself in a drunken stupor and just forgot about it?

    Edit: Just reread your OP and you said you def cleaned it earlier that day.

    Shit happens, I'd let this slide if you really like her. If it happens again down the road I would def address it and make sure she knows you do not appreciate having to clean up her fecal matter.

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    Gold Vwls's Avatar
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    In my experience, shitting and pissing should be done somewhere where your partner can neither hear it, smell it, or even know it happened. Shit like that takes the romance right out of a relationship over time. One time isn't going to ruin things, but repeated incidents.,.. well... bad news. Obv never bring it up in conversation - that only makes it worse. Just forget this happened and hope for a shit-free future with Miss Moneybags.
    ´*•.¸(*•.¸https://twitter.com/RealFckVwls¸.•*´)¸.•*´

    http://i.imgur.com/TsBfg.jpg

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    Gold Deal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vwls View Post
    In my experience, shitting and pissing should be done somewhere where your partner can neither hear it, smell it, or even know it happened. Shit like that takes the romance right out of a relationship over time. One time isn't going to ruin things, but repeated incidents.,.. well... bad news. Obv never bring it up in conversation - that only makes it worse. Just forget this happened and hope for a shit-free future with Miss Moneybags.
    Now that he has posted it here he will never be allowed to forget it. He might as well end it now.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jasep View Post
    I have always tried to carry myself with a high level of integrity in the poker community and I take it very personally when someone calls that in to question.

  17. #17
    Gold Vwls's Avatar
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    Yes it's possible it's over. It all depends on his current level of feeling for her.
    ´*•.¸(*•.¸https://twitter.com/RealFckVwls¸.•*´)¸.•*´

    http://i.imgur.com/TsBfg.jpg

  18. #18
    Feelin' Stronger Every Day tony bagadonuts's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vegas1369 View Post
    Serious question... Are you sure you didn't do this yourself in a drunken stupor and just forgot about it?

    Edit: Just reread your OP and you said you def cleaned it earlier that day.

    Shit happens, I'd let this slide if you really like her. If it happens again down the road I would def address it and make sure she knows you do not appreciate having to clean up her fecal matter.
    Agreed, but the story doesn't make sense. Something here doesn't jive. Why would a meticulous, anal retentive neat freak leave a bowl full of shit splatter for her new boyfriend to possibly discover??

    Maybe clarification is in order. Was it the bottom of the ring that was splattered? If so then perhaps she was ignorant to the devastation she left for our hero to find, and moreover would be MORTIFIED if ever made aware.

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    Platinum splitthis's Avatar
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    FYI girls shit too. Christ go back to your fantasy world.

     
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      Walter Sobchak: ironic

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    Quote Originally Posted by tony bagadonuts View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by vegas1369 View Post
    Serious question... Are you sure you didn't do this yourself in a drunken stupor and just forgot about it?

    Edit: Just reread your OP and you said you def cleaned it earlier that day.

    Shit happens, I'd let this slide if you really like her. If it happens again down the road I would def address it and make sure she knows you do not appreciate having to clean up her fecal matter.
    Agreed, but the story doesn't make sense. Something here doesn't jive. Why would a meticulous, anal retentive neat freak leave a bowl full of shit splatter for her new boyfriend to possibly discover??

    Maybe clarification is in order. Was it the bottom of the ring that was splattered? If so then perhaps she was ignorant to the devastation she left for our hero to find, and moreover would be MORTIFIED if ever made aware.
    It was underneath the seat not in the bowl in plain view, definite ignorance imo. Still a violation. Funny thing is I do not see any splatter when I lift up the seat at her place. I also shared a hotel room with her for three days, and I did not see any evidence of any splatter. I think this might have been an isolated lapse of judgment.

    Question for Vwls, you mention you do not drop any steamers around your significant other. What happens when you are on vacation in a hotel with one toilet. Do you just bite your lower lip until he leaves the room in the morning, or do you simply run the sink water while you anchor down to drown out the noise?

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