strat / equity question: whats the best night to go to a rural Walmart?

[sonatine]

Scenario A: 9pm Saturday night -

Plusses:

- Most registers open
- Those slow roasted chickens will probably be available in the food court
- Sun is down which makes for a relaxing drive through the Catskills

Negatives:

- Monticello has this massive Jew-munity so the second the sun goes down, Walmart becomes swamped with incredibly dour orthodox jews, bickering with eachother, themselves, and their God over prices, how kosher something is, so on.
- More people = more diseases floating around, more germs and bacteria infecting everything.
- Also these are not attractive people. Also maneuvering around them in the isles is an endless parade of horror.



Scenario B: midnight, Saturday night

Plusses:

- Fewer weird diseases floating around
- Fewer methed out catastrophies drifting around the road en route
- Sun definitely down which is nice

Negatives:

- Fewer registers open
- Definitely not getting one of those slow roasted chickens at midnight
- Still a Jewbalee (but less so)
- Drunk drivers starting to be a concern around this time


I feel like the midnight Walmart run has more equity here but Im looking for community input.



edit: Really bad thread title, totally misleading.

[Vwls]

Walmart near me is always ridiculously crowded, be it 9 or midnight. Employees are impossibly rude and seriously do nothing to make your shopping or check-out experience run smoother or faster. The only reason I ever go there is to get Clamato for under $5.00 a bottle. There is no other point, unless you enjoy people watching... I'll admit the odds are pretty good that you'll see something entertaining in a sad sort of way.

I would actually go more often if there was a contingency of Orthodox Jews meandering through the aisles. Might learn a few choice Yiddish curses.

[sonatine]

Im in the Catskills, I feel blessed to have a Walmart supercenter within 30 miles. Without them my options after 6pm become luridly grim.

[Dan Druff]

Take pictures while there please.

[RealTalk]

if you go later there will only be like 2 registers open, and you will have to stand in line with some jethro that is going to want to start some stupid hillbilly conversation with you. if you go earlier the self-scan registers will be open and you will be able to check out much quicker. this highly outweighs any benefits of going later in the evening imo

[sonatine]

Take pictures while there please.

I have some doozies already, Ill get some uploaded later.

Reviews:

This is, by far, the worst Wal-Mart I've ever been in. I usually drive approximately 30 miles to visit another store. There are rarely enough registers open, the self-checkouts never work, the store is dirty and often unstocked, and no one seems to care a bit. It's horrible.

The worst Walmart in history. Never ever go to this one. That's why I travel to other Walmart's and avoid Monticello

By far the worst Walmart store I've ever been in and its even worse in the summer months. I intentionally drive 30 minutes away to shop because its that bad.


All the reviews are like this.

[shortbuspoker]

I generally go around 3am or so. No chance for rotisserie chicken, but you'll most likely be alone with the exception of the meth head shelf stockers and the mexicans buffing the floors.

[sonatine]

if you go later there will only be like 2 registers open, and you will have to stand in line with some jethro that is going to want to start some stupid hillbilly conversation with you. if you go earlier the self-scan registers will be open and you will be able to check out much quicker. this highly outweighs any benefits of going later in the evening imo

Wow. Strong case being made here for saying fuck it and going tomorrow, I didnt even realize they had self scan registers open in the earlier hours.

[limitles]

Walmart is awful because of the people who are there, it's truly depressing

[sonatine]

[408Mike]

GODATINE

I love you

anyway, I'm prob going to say 9pm because after sanitizing your exposed skin (*all* of it) while making your way to your car you will be enjoying 4$ oven roasted chicken and savoring every fucking morsel of it.

I think it's worth it, but then I have an immune system impenetrable by modern flu and cold strains so I am less bothered by wading through pools of sweaty third worlders than most.

the meth addicts angle is pretty lolz worthy, remember this lady?

"
Woman Caught Making Meth Inside WALMART; Was In Store For 6 Hours
Posted: Dec 09, 2011 9:01 AM PST Updated: Dec 10, 2011 8:47 AM PST

FOX23.COM - Tulsa police arrest a woman for mixing chemicals to make meth inside a South Tulsa Walmart Thursday.

Elizabeth Alisha Greta Halfmoon, 45, also known to go by Alisha Halfmoon, was arrested for endeavoring to manufacture meth at the 81st and Lewis store.

Police say surveillance video shows Halfmoon had been in the store since noon. Six hours later security noticed she was acting suspicious, so they called Tulsa Police.

Responding officers say she claimed she was "too broke to buy the chemicals."

"She didn't have the money to make the purchases of the chemicals that were needed so she was taking what was needed in the bottle," says Officer David Shelby.

Shoppers inside the store had no idea someone was cooking meth at the store.

"This is a family store," says Jessica Fuentes, who also had her 1-year-old son inside the store. "People need to start thinking. If she has family she needs to think about her family. If you are broke. It's just wrong."

"When I saw her she had just finished mixing sulfuric acid with starter fluid in a bottle," says Officer Shelby.

They immediately got her, and the ingredients, out of the store before any of the shoppers got hurt.

No one was evacuated.

"Something could have happened, something could have blown up in there," says shopper Jonathan Tary.

"When firefighters were on the scene she made statements to them that is what she was doing, she was attempting to obtain these chemicals and was in the process of trying to manufacture meth. However, she said she was not very good at it," says Shelby.<----WTF

A responding officer didn't know the bottle was active. As he was discarding the bottle the chemicals burned through the bottle and through his gloves.<----MORON

He was treated for chemical burns on his hands and is okay.<---THANK THE LORD!!!!

Police say they arrested Halfmoon just last month in a smurf sting. Smurfs are known among police as meth cooks or recruits who purchase pseudoephedrine to make meth. The medication is often found in cold and allergy medicines and is the main ingredient needed to make meth.<--AT LEAST SHE'S AMBITIOUS!

Jail records show she was booked on November 6 and released from jail on those charges on December 6.<---- AND TENACIOUS!

Records show she received a deferred sentence and bonded out on $7,500.

In October, Glenn Reese was arrested at that same Walmart with a backpack containing what police called an active meth lab. Drainage ditches and tunnels in that area have been a common place for meth making and using, according to Tulsa police."

omg, i HAVE to go back through that article and highlight the lulz. think it fits perfectly here GOD i love america. the real day to day shit that goes on is far funnier than anything scripted.

ok i might be getting laid, someone else can highlight, fuck it.

*GODATINE -IS- GODATINE*

*EDIT I FUCKING DID IT ANYWAY*