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Thread: *** OFFICIAL *** Colonoscopy Thread

  1. #61
    Plutonium Sanlmar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by desertrunner View Post
    Druff- Where are you going to secure the jew wallet during the procedure??
    Why would he have his wallet?

    Vending machine purchase?

    They don’t card you at the door.

  2. #62
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sanlmar View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by desertrunner View Post
    Druff- Where are you going to secure the jew wallet during the procedure??
    Why would he have his wallet?

    Vending machine purchase?

    They don’t card you at the door.
    Actually, I do usually bring my wallet everywhere I go, and I do need some things from inside of it, such as my ID and insurance card.

    However, since I'm not driving to or from this, I will probably just bring those two cards.

  3. #63
    100% Organic MumblesBadly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by tgull View Post

    Nobody, and I mean nobody with a reasonable IQ would take your advice on this. Maybe someone just driven for an outcome to drive their own narrative actually thinks swigging a gallon of Gatorade is going to yield the same results as a medical driven solution. You are a lot like Steve Jobs, he was a huge success in technology and thought he knew it all and is dead because he got his medical advice from, well, himself. You had some success in poker, fuck whatever keep chugging Gatorade. Hard to believe a guy so paranoid about corona won't order a pizza but is on the internet researching colors of Gatorade. Listen to yourself.
    Nobody needs to take my advice on this.

    I posted a study from actual medical researchers who know a lot more about this stuff than either of us.

    I'll be sure to ask for your opinion later if I clog my toilet from all the shitting after the Miralax.
    Face it, Druff. You used the SCIENCE card this time, but you have a troubling reputation of ignoring scientific research findings that don’t agree with your worldview, usually by claiming that the researchers are liberals and only publish results that support their agendas.

    With that in mind, have you ever thought that the study you cited was partially funded by the makers of Mirilax, with the researchers biasing their reporting to favor their financial sponsors?
    _____________________________________________
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    I actually hope this [second impeachment] succeeds, because I want Trump put down politically like a sick, 14-year-old dog. ... I don't want him complicating the 2024 primary season. I just want him done.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Were Republicans cowardly or unethical not to go along with [convicting Trump in the second impeachment Senate trial]? No. The smart move was to reject it.

  4. #64
    Diamond dwai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MumblesBadly View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post

    Nobody needs to take my advice on this.

    I posted a study from actual medical researchers who know a lot more about this stuff than either of us.

    I'll be sure to ask for your opinion later if I clog my toilet from all the shitting after the Miralax.
    Face it, Druff. You used the SCIENCE card this time, but you have a troubling reputation of ignoring scientific research findings that don’t agree with your worldview, usually by claiming that the researchers are liberals and only publish results that support their agendas.

    With that in mind, have you ever thought that the study you cited was partially funded by the makers of Mirilax, with the researchers biasing their reporting to favor their financial sponsors?



    HE'S GOT A POINT DRUFF

     
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      garrett: lol...

  5. #65
    Speedster Out of Clemson adamantium's Avatar
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    I got some codeine for lower back pain , the pills got me constipated as all hell, didnt shit for a week , got all kinds of shit from the pharmacy but no bueno.
    The pain is the worst I have ever experienced, at the end I just locked myself in the bathroom and stayed there to take a shit or die trying.
    It all worked out in the end with tears in my eyes and a bloody asshole, my god what pain.
    If you need to interrogate ragheads in Guantanamo get them constipated and they will sing like a bird.

    Also clogged the shitter.
    Slava Ukraini!

  6. #66
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MumblesBadly View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post

    Nobody needs to take my advice on this.

    I posted a study from actual medical researchers who know a lot more about this stuff than either of us.

    I'll be sure to ask for your opinion later if I clog my toilet from all the shitting after the Miralax.
    Face it, Druff. You used the SCIENCE card this time, but you have a troubling reputation of ignoring scientific research findings that don’t agree with your worldview, usually by claiming that the researchers are liberals and only publish results that support their agendas.

    With that in mind, have you ever thought that the study you cited was partially funded by the makers of Mirilax, with the researchers biasing their reporting to favor their financial sponsors?
    There's been a number of studies, not just that one.

    The Miralax prep is long-accepted in the medical community. Additionally, it's not difficult to determine if it works or not. If doctors can see the colon properly without issue, then it worked. If it were a fail, it would have been known many years ago.

    I also have no history here of ignoring the science. I just don't accept junk science.

  7. #67
    Plutonium simpdog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by adamantium View Post
    I got some codeine for lower back pain , the pills got me constipated as all hell, didnt shit for a week , got all kinds of shit from the pharmacy but no bueno.
    The pain is the worst I have ever experienced, at the end I just locked myself in the bathroom and stayed there to take a shit or die trying.
    It all worked out in the end with tears in my eyes and a bloody asshole, my god what pain.
    If you need to interrogate ragheads in Guantanamo get them constipated and they will sing like a bird.

    Also clogged the shitter.
    Were you able to unclog it yourself or did you PM bottomset?

  8. #68
    Speedster Out of Clemson adamantium's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by simpdog View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by adamantium View Post
    I got some codeine for lower back pain , the pills got me constipated as all hell, didnt shit for a week , got all kinds of shit from the pharmacy but no bueno.
    The pain is the worst I have ever experienced, at the end I just locked myself in the bathroom and stayed there to take a shit or die trying.
    It all worked out in the end with tears in my eyes and a bloody asshole, my god what pain.
    If you need to interrogate ragheads in Guantanamo get them constipated and they will sing like a bird.

    Also clogged the shitter.
    Were you able to unclog it yourself or did you PM bottomset?
    Did the dirty work myself, bottomset was to busy
    Slava Ukraini!

  9. #69
    Diamond BCR's Avatar
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    If it’s basically bile-colored water coming out of you before you leave, you’re cool. That’s what they’re looking for as far as prep.

  10. #70
    Flashlight Master desertrunner's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sanlmar View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by desertrunner View Post
    Druff- Where are you going to secure the jew wallet during the procedure??
    Why would he have his wallet?

    Vending machine purchase?

    They don’t card you at the door.
    LOL, I just enjoy the "jew wallet" character.

  11. #71
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Colonoscopy was today at 9:30.

    I'll do a longer writeup in the next post.

    The most important detail:

    I had four polyps, including a large precancerous one.



    The three smaller ones were snipped off with the normal tool, the big one was removed (burned off?) with a "hot snare".

    All four were sent for biopsy. I won't get those results for 7-10 days, though it's likely they will be as expected (three benign, one precancerous).

    The doctor said my colon otherwise looked good, and there was no sign of actual cancer, so looks like I did this just in time. I will return for another one in 2024.

    Suffice to say that it's good I did this. Had I waited much longer, I could have been looking at Stage 1 colon cancer. Had I waited years longer, I could have been looking at death in my 50s.

    My advice: If you are 45+ with a family history, or if you're 50+ with no family history, go do this. It might save your life, as it probably saved mine.

  12. #72
    Plutonium simpdog's Avatar
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    Glad to hear it went well. Really don't need any more details lol.

    Did you know only ~5% of the precancerous polyps actually progress to cancer? While you may have saved yourself from colon cancer, it's not that likely at this point.
    Edit How large was the big one?

    Did the doctor ask you to return in 3 years? Or your request?

  13. #73
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Now onto the less important details.

    Honestly I don't regret any of my choices here, aside from waiting too long.


    The Prep

    Not pleasant, but not nearly as bad as portrayed by most. The fact that I went the Miralax/Gatorade route really helped. No nasty taste. Even though Miralax is tasteless, it does change the consistency a little bit, so something feels a bit "off" drinking it, compared to normal Gatorade. I'm also not a fan of the non-red (meaning not red, orange or purple) Gatorade, so there was that, too. When I first started drinking it, I got a bit nauseous right away, but I think it's because I gulped it down a bit too fast. I slowed down and that stopped happening.

    One big surprise was the fact that it did NOT act quickly. I took 4 Ducolax tablets at 3:30pm yesterday, and then drank 32oz of the Gatorade/Miralax from 4:30-5:30pm (also yesterday). It took until 8:30pm for me to start shitting. I imagined this would happen in about 20 minutes, but it took 3 hours. After an hour passed with no action, I thought maybe I did something wrong, and I pictured bottomset chiding me for choosing this version of the prep. I texted my sister, who told me she had the identical experience, and that hers took 3 hours. Indeed, so did mine.

    While I didn't love the watery diarrhea, it wasn't as bad as people say. Sure, I had to use the toilet a lot, but sometimes I'd go 1-2 hours between. Overall I think I went like 7 times. By the end, it was completely watery and clear yellow, like it was supposed to be, so I was confident I did it right.

    One thing that surprised me was that I was not hungry at all. I had prepared beef bone broth and Jell-O to eat. Didn't need it. I went the entire day yesterday without touching any food after 5:30am. The next food I ate was noon today -- over 30 hours later.

    It was a pain in the ass waking up in the middle of the night to take the other 32oz of Miralax/Gatorade. I also stayed up for about 90 minutes after that so I could use the bathroom, which would inevitably happen. I was paranoid about literally shitting the bed in my sleep.

    I went back to sleep but set an alarm for 5:25am. The procedure was to be at 9:30am. I chose 5:25am because it was my last opportunity to drink anything. I gulped down 24 ounces of water, and then had to decide whether to go back to sleep or stay up. I elected to stay up, because I tend to get very thirsty while sleeping, and I figured 4 hours awake would be an easier no-water fast than 2 hours sleeping and 2 hours awake. I was right, as this wasn't very difficult.



    The Leadup

    Because of the psychological damage I took in 2018, I was nervous about the falling asleep portion on the propofol. My biggest concern was that I would be in the "between sleeping and awake" state, which my brain now really hates, and I kinda freak out when I catch myself in that state. I explained this to the anesthesiologist, who was very nice, and suggested that she administer it quickly, rather than slowly. She said most patients enjoy the euphoric feeling of receiving it slowly, but since I don't want that, she would give it quickly and I'd fall asleep fast.

    They were nice/flexible there, and let me keep my phone until just before wheeling me into the room for the procedure. This helped keep my mind off of it. I was tweeting and texting with people up until a few minutes before the procedure! After I got on my side, they administered the propofol without warning, and I simply heard them say, "The sedation has started."

    I asked, "Wait, I'm getting the propofol now?"

    I felt nothing yet.

    They said yes, and after about 10 seconds, I started noticing I was rapidly getting tired, and I started to feel a bit dizzy, with my vision shifting back and forth. Not a bad feeling at all -- I'd compare it to the way you feel when you get in bed and are super tired already. I decided, "Well, might as well go with it" and just closed my eyes and attempted to fall asleep. About a second later, I was out.

    Apparently a burning sensation is common when administering propofol, but I didn't feel it, even though I was warned there was a good chance I would. Nobody in my immediate family has ever felt the burning, so perhaps it's hereditary.



    The Aftermath

    It then felt like about an hour sleep. No dreams. (Some report dreams on propofol, but I didn't have any.) It didn't feel instantaneous -- more like a short sleep, where you wake up aware that you were sleeping for a short time.

    I woke up back in the recovery room where I started. The first person I saw was the doctor. She told me about the four polyps, including the large, precancerous one, which was 1.5cm. As I mentioned, she said the colon itself looked good, and that cancer is unlikely, but they were sending all four to be biopsied. There is a good chance that the large polyp was the cause of my recent anemia.

    I have to go back in 3 years.

    Kinda strange to think about the fact that there's a fair chance I wouldn't have seen my 60th birthday -- or maybe not even my 55th -- if I hadn't done this. I will be very diligent about the follow-ups going forward.

    The doctor and staff were all very nice, and the place was run well. I will be returning to the same facility in 2024. If you haven't had a colonoscopy yet and are over 50, or are 45-49 and have a family history of colon cancer or precancerous polyps, you should 100% get this done.

     
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      splitthis: Congrats on a clean ass, now only put good healthy food in it

  14. #74
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by simpdog View Post
    Glad to hear it went well. Really don't need any more details lol.

    Did you know only ~5% of the precancerous polyps actually progress to cancer? While you may have saved yourself from colon cancer, it's not that likely at this point.
    Edit How large was the big one?

    Did the doctor ask you to return in 3 years? Or your request?
    I had thought it was 15%, not 5%. But yeah, I just looked it up and it says 5%.

    I will note that my grandmother actually died of it, and my father had a precancerous one which looked so bad that they actually had him back sooner than 3 years. He was only 55 when this happened.

    Given my family history, I'm guessing it was significantly more than 5% that thing was going to kill me, but even 5% sucks obviously.

    The doctor told me to return in 3 years. As the previous post said, the big one was 1.5cm.

  15. #75
    Plutonium simpdog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by simpdog View Post
    Glad to hear it went well. Really don't need any more details lol.

    Did you know only ~5% of the precancerous polyps actually progress to cancer? While you may have saved yourself from colon cancer, it's not that likely at this point.
    Edit How large was the big one?

    Did the doctor ask you to return in 3 years? Or your request?
    I had thought it was 15%, not 5%. But yeah, I just looked it up and it says 5%.

    I will note that my grandmother actually died of it, and my father had a precancerous one which looked so bad that they actually had him back sooner than 3 years. He was only 55 when this happened.

    Given my family history, I'm guessing it was significantly more than 5% that thing was going to kill me, but even 5% sucks obviously.

    The doctor told me to return in 3 years. As the previous post said, the big one was 1.5cm.
    I didn't see the second longer post when I posted.

    1.5cm is fairly large and is likely in the ~15-30% range, so definitely good that you had it done.

    Hereditary colon cancer is mostly just your parents not grandparents (however obviously they would pass it down to your parents), so I'm guessing it was your father's mother who died of it.

  16. #76
    Platinum GrenadaRoger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Colonoscopy was today at 9:30.


    I had four polyps, including a large precancerous one.
    so now there's proof you have not been a perfect asshole


    (SrlySrly should be ashamed)
    Last edited by GrenadaRoger; 01-22-2021 at 02:01 PM.
    (long before there was a PFA i had my Grenade & Crossbones avatar at DD)

  17. #77
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by simpdog View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post

    I had thought it was 15%, not 5%. But yeah, I just looked it up and it says 5%.

    I will note that my grandmother actually died of it, and my father had a precancerous one which looked so bad that they actually had him back sooner than 3 years. He was only 55 when this happened.

    Given my family history, I'm guessing it was significantly more than 5% that thing was going to kill me, but even 5% sucks obviously.

    The doctor told me to return in 3 years. As the previous post said, the big one was 1.5cm.
    I didn't see the second longer post when I posted.

    1.5cm is fairly large and is likely in the ~15-30% range, so definitely good that you had it done.

    Hereditary colon cancer is mostly just your parents not grandparents (however obviously they would pass it down to your parents), so I'm guessing it was your father's mother who died of it.
    Yes, it was my father's mother who died of it.

    The one thing I'm still trying to figure out is how likely it is that the big one will test as cancerous. So I guess I'm not 100% out of the woods yet, though the doctor said my colon otherwise "looked good" and she didn't think I should be concerned about having colon cancer.

    That big polyp is scaring me though, I'm not gonna lie.

    Wish I could pay to have that expedited.


  18. #78
    Gold Cerveza Fria's Avatar
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    Here's the transcript of the Pre-Op conversation between the Doc and Druff....


    Doc: It's ok. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. It's perfectly normal to experience an erection during this type of procedure.

    Druff: But, Doc, I don't have an erection.

    Doc: I know, but I do. Now just relax and count backwards from 100....

    Druff: WTF?

  19. #79
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cerveza Fria View Post
    Here's the transcript of the Pre-Op conversation between the Doc and Druff....


    Doc: It's ok. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. It's perfectly normal to experience an erection during this type of procedure.

    Druff: But, Doc, I don't have an erection.

    Doc: I know, but I do. Now just relax and count backwards from 100....

    Druff: WTF?
    That would have been an especially disturbing conversation, given that the doctor was female.

     
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      Cerveza Fria: oops...nevermind...

  20. #80
    100% Organic MumblesBadly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cerveza Fria View Post
    Here's the transcript of the Pre-Op conversation between the Doc and Druff....


    Doc: It's ok. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. It's perfectly normal to experience an erection during this type of procedure.

    Druff: But, Doc, I don't have an erection.

    Doc: I know, but I do. Now just relax and count backwards from 100....

    Druff: WTF?
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post

    ...

    I woke up back in the recovery room where I started. The first person I saw was the doctor. She told me about the four polyps...
    _____________________________________________
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    I actually hope this [second impeachment] succeeds, because I want Trump put down politically like a sick, 14-year-old dog. ... I don't want him complicating the 2024 primary season. I just want him done.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Were Republicans cowardly or unethical not to go along with [convicting Trump in the second impeachment Senate trial]? No. The smart move was to reject it.

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