When it comes to America versus Europe cultural and governmental discussions, I'm usually on the side of the Americans, but one area where I believe Europe has it correct is tipping culture. In Europe, they don't tip very much, and it's rarely expected or automatic.
American tipping culture has gotten out of control, and I now believe it has become more about the tipper wanting to feel good about himself rather than truly caring about the plight of service employees.
Tip For This, Not That
First off, tipping is full of contradictions and arbitrary standards. Supposedly we tip for "service" and to "help low paid employees make a living", but a closer look shows that this is extremely arbitrary and almost random.
You tip the valet and the bellman, but you don't tip the front desk employee unless he/she does you a favor.
You tip the blackjack dealer and the cocktail waitress, but not the guy cleaning the public bathroom you just used in the same casino.
You tip the server at a restaurant 18% or more, but only a little of that goes to the busboys, dishwashing crew, and hostess. In many cases, the assistant chefs end up making far less than the servers.
Tipping at restaurants is in relation to the cost of the meal, even though it's just as difficult to serve a cheap meal as it is an expensive one. However, servers at expensive restaurants will often make up to 20x more in tips than servers at cheap restaurants.
Restaurant servers get 18%+ in tips, but those working the takeout area tend to get a few dollars tip at most, and often get nothing.
You tip the guys driving the shuttle at the airport for lifting your bag on and off the bus, but you don't tip the airline checkin staff for lifting your bag, weighing it, and putting it onto the belt.
You are forced to give mandatory "gratuities" to the staff on cruise ships, which most cruise lines simply pocket and use to pay wages.
Casino employees doing government-mandated "handpays" of jackpots over $1200 expect tips, yet you do not typically tip the cashier or anyone else doing administrative paperwork for you at the casino.
Hotel maids, despite doing a (literally) crappy job for low pay, only receive irregular tips, and not very much.
Blackjack dealers expect tips in proportion to the amount being wagered, even if the player is losing overall, and even though the games are -EV. Some of these dealers make near $100k/year after tips, but you are still expected to tip them well.
You are expected to leave a tip to the person cutting your hair, even if they work for themselves and set their own price.
You are expected to tip drivers (such as taxicabs and Uber), even if they work for themselves.
You are NOT expected to tip a repairman who comes to your house and fixes something, whether or not he works for himself.
You are NOT expected to tip a fast food employee, even though they tend to make minimum wage and are doing a service job.
If there is a mandatory auto-tip in place, such as a large-party 18% restaurant tip or poker tournament auto-tip, you are somehow considered an asshole if you leave 1-2% extra because it's "insulting", yet it's perfectly okay to leave 0% extra. (Explain that one!)
I could go on and on with this stuff.
I Tip, Therefore I'm a Better Person
However, if you bring up the subject of tipping, Americans get very sanctimonious.
People love to brag and one-up each other when it comes to the standard tips they supposedly leave.
"I always leave 20% minimum at restaurants!"
"Oh yeah? Well I leave 25% minimum and 35% if the service is good!"
"So what? I will leave 20% if the service is bad, 30% normally, and 40% if it's good!"
If you dare speak out against tipping culture, you are chided for "not caring about people making minimum wage" and "being a cheap, selfish asshole."
When you ask about the arbitrary customary tipping as described above, where certain positions get it and others don't, with no rhyme or reason, you're told, "That's the way it is" or "Nobody's stopping you from also tipping those other people."
Just Fair Pay, Please
In reality, tipping has just shifted the burden of pay from the employers to the customers, and often leaves customers in an awkward position to figure out exactly how much to leave.
There really isn't a reason for tipping at all, except perhaps after-the-fact, under-the-table sort of tipping, for receiving extra favors or whatever. Servers should simply be paid a fair wage. The ones working at places like Denny's are underpaid, and the ones working at nice restaurants are way overpaid. There should be some difference in pay depending upon the level of the restaurant, but not an order of magnitude.
In general, employees should not be receiving tips for doing their standard jobs. They should be paid fair wages to start, and that should be that. This also would make compensation more equitable across the profession. Presently, some do much better than others, simply because they happen to score a job at a place with a higher-priced menu or higher limit blackjack tables.
But when it all comes down to it, I've realized that most people get so defensive about tipping because they see tipping as an extension of what makes them a good person. Most people tip so they can feel good about themselves, not because they really have a strong desire to actually help anyone. This is why the "generous tippers" at restaurants rarely hand money to the guy they pass by in the hotel who is mopping the floor. If tipping was really about helping low paid employees, they'd give more handouts to people mopping the floor, and a less generous tip to an already-overpaid prime steakhouse server.
Better to Believe a Pleasant Lie Than the Harsh Truth
I noticed something really interesting on a cruise forum a few years ago.
I came to learn that the mandatory auto-tip (now standard on almost all cruise lines) actually goes into the pockets of the cruise line. See, there's a maritime minimum wage, which all cruise lines have agreed to adhere to. However, that minimum wage applies to TOTAL pay, not base pay. Therefore, any "tips" count toward that wage, and if the employee is tipped as much as the mininum wage, then the cruise line can legally give them zero base pay. So what's happening here? The mandatory "tips" are actually now acting more as a resort fee, where it makes the cruise look cheaper (since you pay the tips at the end, not when you book), and they simply subtract those mandatory tips from the wage that the employees would have otherwise received. Sneaky, huh? This is industry-wide, and not just on one cruise line.
Well, I brought this to the attention of people on a cruise forum. They flipped out. Nobody would accept it. Nobody would believe it. Even when I cited evidence and legal language which made it clear this was happening, everyone was still in denial. Why? Because these people had mostly stopped tipping normally, believing that their auto-tips were covering all service employees onboard. Now I was shattering their reality. They actually hadn't been tipping! It was a nasty accounting trick being pulled by the cruise industry! These people didn't want to believe they had been cruising for the last several years without tipping, so they bent over backward trying to explain why I had to be wrong.
There's also a way to opt out of these auto-tips on cruise lines. Some had stated that they would opt-out and then tip normally again, and they drew tremendous ire from the crowd, insisting that they were "screwing the behind-the-scenes guys", and that they were "cheap assholes". Even when presented with evidence that their auto-tips weren't actually helping any of the employees -- but only helping the cruise line -- these people wouldn't budge.
Conclusion
People tip to feel good. If you show them that they actually haven't been tipping, they panic -- even if it wasn't their fault.
I would love to see tipping vanish forever in the US. Europe doesn't have this insane tipping culture, and in fact they have laws in certain countries where foreign companies doing business there (such as cruise lines) cannot charge mandatory auto-tips to their citizens. So, in the cruise line example, that auto-tip isn't required of many European passengers due to this law.
Hats off to Europe for saying "no" to this dumb tipping routine!
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Originally Posted by adamantium
