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Thread: Jokes you like post them here

  1. #41
    Canadrunk
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    This is classic Conan but I cannot believe that this is an actual service in Japan.
    Japan you are number one


  2. #42
    Canadrunk
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    If you aren't sure about viewing a Conan video
    here is just a taste

    this is just a snapshot of the hilarity

    Name:  cona .png
Views: 148
Size:  544.0 KB

  3. #43
    Platinum Lord of the Fraud's Avatar
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    Sorry boys



    Phoned my boss and said " I have a wee cough"
    " you have a wee cough? " came his reply
    " thank you " i said and hurriedly hung up

    Since the snow and sleet started the wife has been constantly looking thru the window...
    If she carries on ill have to let her in.

    People are usually shocked when they find out what a bad electrician I am.


    I went to a fancy dress party over the holidays dressed as a chicken.
    I met a girl dressed as an egg....
    Btw .the answer to the old riddle is chicken


    ME..." what would you do if we won the lottery"
    WIFE.." id take half and leave you"
    ME.." I won 25 last night , here's 12:50 now fuck off"


    I said to the wife ." Let's make a really nice weekend for each other"
    She said " ok ...good idea"
    I said " ok...see you on monday"


    Me..." I don't like how you look with the new glasses"
    WIFE ..." I'm not wearing new glasses"
    ME.." no but I am "

     
    Comments
      
      limitles: excellent or brilliant as you folks like to say
    http://pnimg.net/w/articles-attachments/1/4c2/74d75c36d2.jpg

  4. #44
    Canadrunk
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    Q: How can you tell if Nancy Pelosi will be tight-lipped about a hot button issue?





    A: Because she will also be tight-foreheaded and tight-eyelided!

  5. #45
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  6. #46
    Canadrunk
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  7. #47
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    edit: sidebitch

    If you want more funny try out ... Bill Murray's last appearance on Late Night

    Name:  murray.png
Views: 112
Size:  841.5 KB
    Last edited by limitles; 02-16-2019 at 11:55 AM.

  8. #48
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    Last edited by limitles; 02-26-2019 at 08:37 PM.

  9. #49
    Canadrunk
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    After going to the circus the daughter asks her father
    "Daddy how do they make the bear ride the bicycle?"

    Father replies, "How do you think they they do it
    they nail his paws to the pedals
    and beat the shit out of him."

  10. #50

  11. #51
    Canadrunk
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    In my teens I was diagnosed with attention deficit disorder.
    Upon hearing the news my Jewish parents were shocked, then horrified
    when it was was suggested I attend summer concentration camp.



    jk, jk
    Last edited by limitles; 03-08-2019 at 10:40 PM.

  12. #52
    Canadrunk
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    Why did Sally fall off the swing set?

    Cause she has no arms.

    Knock Knock

    Who's there?

     
    Not Sally

  13. #53
    Canadrunk
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    Half the homeless in L.A. are
    people who just got sick of driving

    Bill Burr

  14. #54
    You're like a fart in a hurricane.

  15. #55
    Canadrunk
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    Quote Originally Posted by FRANKRIZZO View Post
    You're like a fart in a hurricane.
    good one Italian/greek robot
    why did the roman/greek empire fail
    because the slaves inherited all of it

  16. #56
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    What the favourite condiment in Russia?


     
    Soyuz sauce

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