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Thread: Vote for Andrew Neeme in this year's American Poker Awards annual polls!

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    100% Organic MumblesBadly's Avatar
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    Vote for Andrew Neeme in this year's American Poker Awards annual polls!

    Go here and cast your votes for Andrew Neeme for Video Blogger of the Year and Poker Personality of the Year. Polling closes tomorrow (Thursday), February 15.

    http://www.americanpokerawards.com/f...oses-thursday/

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    _____________________________________________
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    I actually hope this [second impeachment] succeeds, because I want Trump put down politically like a sick, 14-year-old dog. ... I don't want him complicating the 2024 primary season. I just want him done.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Were Republicans cowardly or unethical not to go along with [convicting Trump in the second impeachment Senate trial]? No. The smart move was to reject it.

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    Inaugural Spring Classic Champion HoodedN's Avatar
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    Lol at mumbles fan-girling over this dweeb. Know your audience tubby

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    Gold SetofKs's Avatar
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    Please delete this threAd. Only Michael is allowed to
    Campaign for votes on these forums

     
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      michael: lol, plopoty

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    Thanks for calling attention to this important election.

     
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      The_Lurker: solid
      
      MumblesBadly: This message is *not* endorsed by the @TheRealMumblesBadly
    shit·show
    /ˈSHit ˌSHō/
    noun
    1) a situation or event marked by chaos or controversy. 2) This site.

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    Master of Props Daly's Avatar
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    Oh this is really a thing?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Daly View Post
    Oh this is really a thing?


    I know right?


    This whole one vote per IP is just plain fascist.

    I got the better of them, and have been driving all over town just to find free wifi, and so far I am up to 136 votes.

     
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      MumblesBadly: They better have been for Andrew Neeme!

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    Quote Originally Posted by wrenchjockey View Post
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    Thanks for calling attention to this important election.
    Ugh! I can't stand listening to Doug Polk verbally ventilate. I might have enjoyed his style of delivery when I was 11.

     
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      wrenchjockey: Correct choice confirmed
      
      Rick Sanchez: I'm gonna need you to ventilate that waaaaaaay up your asshole, Mumbly.
    _____________________________________________
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    I actually hope this [second impeachment] succeeds, because I want Trump put down politically like a sick, 14-year-old dog. ... I don't want him complicating the 2024 primary season. I just want him done.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Were Republicans cowardly or unethical not to go along with [convicting Trump in the second impeachment Senate trial]? No. The smart move was to reject it.

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    Diamond Tellafriend's Avatar
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    you are blocked, so didn't read thread, but here's this just in case:

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    Early in the morning where the sun is shining bright just above the horizon, the staff of a high school in the glorious city of Canterlot is starting the day as usual, signing in, unlock the door, and prepare for lecturing. The teachers range from unicorns, pegasi, and earth ponies and vary in age. Some of have been teachers for a long time while others are new and have little experience.



    One educator is a middle aged unicorn who teaches the 12th grade and is straightening her desks and organizing her papers frantically. The distraught unicorn uses her magic descending fro her horn to levitate papers and cram them in a drawer in a complete disorganized way, and instead of closing the drawer in quietly, she slams it shut making a loud echo in the room. It also does not help that her classroom door is completely open allowing the cho to travel down the hall. The loud echo startles a much younger earth pony walking down the hall towards her room. The young pony turns around quickly to a large figure behind her and nervously smiles ten continues walking towards the room. The unicorn teacher sweating profusely sits in a wooden chair behind a metal desk and waits as she darts her eyes across the room ensuring it is clean and organized.



    Slight knocks then are heard on her classroom door, and a young earth pony says, "Mrs. Lily, your guest is here."



    The unicorn teacher swallows and responds, "Please bring her in."



    The earth pony steps aside and bows her head. The guest is majestic, tall, white, alicorn with two massive wings and a long pointed horn. Her flank has cutie mark of a bright sun, and the alicorn is wearing a golden crown, a golden chest amulet, and golden hoof shoes.



    Mrs. Lily steps off her chair, bows her head, and says, "Welcome, Princess Celestia. It is an honor having you in the school and in my classroom."



    "Thank you very much,” Celestia says. “I'm actually excited in telling the students about Equestrian history."



    Lily clears her throat, lifts her head, and in a very nervous tone says, "And the students will enjoy it, hopefully. Uh, do you need anything like water? I have bottles beside my desk. Would you like a snack? I have some fruit. Would you like a chair or a stool?"



    Celestia chuckles, "Mrs. Lily, don't be so nervous. I’m just here to tell a story. Nothing more. I'm perfectly fine by the way. When do the students arrive?"



    The teacher slows her breathing down and looks at her clock on her desk. "It's about 7:05 now. So, in about twenty minutes."



    "Well, until then," Celestia says, "tell me about yourself."



    Lily starts informing the princess about where she came from and what made her want to be a teacher, and after some time, young ponies enter the room quietly and nervously while staring at Celestia. Eventually, the time reaches 8:00 and the bell rings to start the school day. All the students except for one pony in the back sit silently and straight giving Princess Celestia their full attention.



    Celestia walks in front of the students with a smile, "Good morning, class." All of the students are quiet and just only stare at the princess.



    Mrs. Lily then yells, "Class, please respond!"



    Startled, the student shout at once, "Good morning, Princess Celestia."



    Celestia looks at the teacher and says, "Mrs. Lily, don't do that again." Lily blushes in embarrassment, and Celestia stares back to the students. "Class, please relax. I am simply here to tell you a story from history that occurred twenty-one years. First, does any pony know about Triton?"



    An eerie silence dominates the classroom atmosphere until a male unicorn with a deep voice in the middle of the room breaks the silence, "My mom told me that he was part of the Royal Family."



    Celestia answers back, "Correct. Specifically, my cousin."



    Then, a pegasus raises her right hoof, and Celestia looks at her allowing the pony to ask, "I heard he was mean, but you’re so nice. Why is that?”



    Celestia's smile deteriorates, "He actually wasn’t always like that. He was at one point... a wonderful pony.” Her smile returns, “ I remember when I, he, and Luna were little.



    "He was sweet, caring, and unselfish. I remember one time, Luna tripped and scrapped her knee a bit. She started to cry, and Triton was there to check on her before I had a chance. He used his magic to heal her, and we all continued playing. Whenever he was away, Luna and I sent him letters all the time, and he would write us back quickly. I even remember when I was about your age he created his own magic spell where he made whips out of his aoura. He used them to tickle us. We loved him dearly, and... I wish he was here as his former self. I guess this is where I should start the story.



    "As I said earlier, this happened twenty-one years ago, and this was during the time Discord was spreading his chaotic magic throughout Equestria. Much like Canterlot and Manehattan, the once great city of Pandora was greatly affected by his destructive magic, and during that time, the mayor of the city fled leaving it and the citizens to perish while he saved himself. Even after defeating Discord, the city was still in great peril. The violence and hatred was rampant. When some ponies tried taking control of the city, it was too much and would step own willingly or be assaulted. Luna and I could not abandon the towns and cities that needed our aid especially Canterlot. So, we contacted Triton and asked him to save Pandora, and he accepted and flew to the city immediately. From what I know, when he arrived at Pandora, half of the ponies greeted him while others were still violent. Despite negative reactions, he did as he promised: rebuild Pandora.



    "He constantly sent Luna and I letters informing us about his progress, and he was doing a magnificent job. After about three months, he told us the city had reclaimed its former glory. Violence had stopped, ponies had somewhere to live, and every pony had a job that contributed to the community. We were so proud of him and knew that he was perfect for this task. However, about two months after that message, the letters had stopped. Luna and I thought nothing of it at first. We figured he was busy or had forgotten, but after three months of no communication, we became worried and sent him a letter asking if he was okay. Instead of sending us a reply back the next day like he usually did, we didn’t hear from him until a week later. He responded with, 'Everything is fine. My city is glorious'.



    "We knew something was wrong and flew to Pandora immediately. We also took the Elements of Harmony in case it was something crucial. I'm glad we did. When we arrived at Pandora, what we saw was...disturbing. The city had regained its size, but it had a -you could say- gloomy and threatening atmosphere. No ponies expect for ones wearing black metal armor walked down the streets. Hanging on every street lamp were red flags with a six-pointed black star in the middle and Triton's face with total black eyes inside the star. Those flags sent chills down my spine. When we got to the middle of the city, we saw a massive castle which was not in Pandora before. We landed in front of two massive wooden doors, and as soon as we landed, the doors opened with Triton standing there. He was expecting us.



    "I could tell immediately something had changed. His eyes were bloodshot and were completely black with no sign of his bright blue iris. His mane, tail, and fur were normal colored but were... off. His black mane and tail were flowing like mine and Lunas but in an usual pattern. His blue fur was ragged and had dark red stripes like a zebra. He was wearing a dark blue crown and a black amulet around his neck both of which had various gems and diamonds all over them. Luna and I didn't want to believe it, but it was true by just the mere sight of him, Triton had embraced his dark magic and was triggered by greed.



    "Before I continue, I need to say this children: Please do not embrace your dark magic. Every pony has dark magic within themselves and anything could ignite or trigger it. Once it is triggered, never embrace it. It will turn you into a monster. I’ve seen it happen to Triton and later Luna. Back to the story.



    "We tried to reason with him but with no avail. He believed that he only lived for his gold and jewels and was..." Celestia closes her eyes tightly, breathes in and out, open her eyes, and continues, "willingly to die for it. He blatantly told us he made a law in the city to submit all wealth to him. I can't remember everything he said exactly...but I do remember this and something else later. He said this exactly, ‘These ponies don't mean anything to me for I am greater than all! I...am...a...god.' We tried telling him that we loved him and tried to convince him to turn back into his former self, instead though...he attacked.



    "It was an intense fight, and he was much stronger and more powerful than Luna and I had thought. I remember one moment of the fight where he demonstrated his power: We took the fight in the air, and Luna was hit by a powerful magic beam from him and collasped. I charged at him, and we were in a horn lock. For those who don't know, this is when two unicorns' or alicorns' horns are side by side, and one pony tries to overpower the other with magic and strength. Anyway, Triton and I were at a horn lock, and he overpowered me with ease pushing me down to the street below. Luna woke up, rushed in, and joined me in the lock. Despite having the both of us using all of our strength, Triton continued to push us down with ease. He definitely had a strength and power advantage, but we had speed and experience. I know you're wondering how we defeated him. Long story or fight short, we tried to force him down to the ground so we can use the Elements of Harmony while he was still down. I distracted him by engaging him in another horn lock while Luna stabbed him in his right shoulder and slashed across his back thighs with her horn. With Triton in intense pain, I overpowered him sending him flying across the street. To assure he would not escape, I used my horn and slashed his left wing. We used the Elements of Harmony to turn him into stone, but before we did, I remember Luna asking him, 'How could you, Triton?'



    "Triton wallowing in pain responded and this was the other second thing I remember him saying exactly, 'Go ahead, turn me stone but heed my words. I will return and this world will be mine! I am darkness! I am Triton! I AM GOD!' He's still in his stone imprisonment. We left him at the abandoned city he ruined. He and Pandora will become nothing more than myths."



    The students with faces of awe sit silently. Celestia looks at the clock at the back of the room and says, "You have a couple of minutes until the next class period. Any questions?"



    A unicorn raises his left hoof and he asks, "I know he did terrible things, but do miss him? Even a little?"



    "Yes," Celestia answers, "Just like how I miss Luna when I banished her ten years ago, I miss Triton a lot. He's still family after all."



    A different pony raises her right hoof, "I know this is off topic but..."



    "It's quite alright," Celestia says, " I don't mind answering any question."



    "Well," she hesitantly starts, "I was wondering where your husband is. I have heard of him but never seen him."



    Celestia smiles and says in a polite yet sad tone, "He's not with us now. He's not dead but on major royal duties elsewhere that has taken every minute of his life for the last sixteen years."



    The same unicorn asks, "Do you miss him?"



    Celestia responds, "Of course, my dear." As soon as the princess finishes, the bell rings. Before leaving the classroom, the students approach the princess, bow their heads, thank her for the story, and politely exit the room. The last student in the back of the classroom is a pink alicorn with gold and silver lining mane and tail, golden eyes, a blank flank, and a bookcase containing three massive textbooks on her back. She approaches Celestia with her eyes reaching the princess' upper chest making her the tallest student.



    "Great job, Mom," the alicorn says.



    "Thanks, Amity," Celestia says in a cheerful tone. "Now," Celestia tilts her head slightly to her left, "get your butt to class. Don't want a tardy on your last day of school." Amity chuckles and walks out the door.



    The last class of the day exists the classroom leaving the teacher and princess alone. The unicorn uses her magic to wrap a purse around her neck preparing to the leave with the princess. "Thank you so much, Your Majesty," Mrs. Lily says.



    "It was my pleasure," Princess Celestia replies. "But before we leave the school, may I see Amity's grades for these last nine weeks?"



    "Sure but why?" the teacher asks curiously.



    "Just to see how she did," Celestia answers.



    Mrs. Lily walks to her desk, opens a drawer, and shows a file with "Amity" written on the tab. She places it on her desk and opens the file containing highly graded tests, quizzes, homework, and rubrics.



    Celestia approaches, and as she observes each graded assignment, Lily proclaims, "She is- or was- a fantastic student and one of my smartest students without a doubt. She’s fast learning, responsive, respectful..."



    "What is this?" Celestia asks in concerned tone with an eyebrow raised. She stares at a test with a red 80 at the top, and she then turns her head to her left to see Amity standing in the classroom doorway. The pink alicorn darts her eyes left to right then smiles at her mother.



    "Your Majesty?" Mrs. Lily interjects. "That test was about a week ago, and it really didn't affect her average. Also, that was the highest grade. Please don't be mad at her. This test’s practically pointless."



    “Thank you, Mrs. Lily,” Princess Celestia says as she places the test on the desk then walks towards her daughter. She says to her pink daughter and says, "From now on, you will tell me every grade you make."



    Amity responds, "But today was my last day of school."



    "Exactly," her mother replies. "I was referring if you go to college." The two alicons walk down the hallway towards double. While behind her mother, Amity rolls her eyes behind Celestia's back. "Don't roll those eyes behind my back.” Celestia unexpectedly states. “I'll roll that little head of yours. Oh, and when we get home, we’ll practice your magic skills and something new to teach you."



    Amity dashes beside her mother, "But I wanted to help see the hoofball game tonight. It's the last one of the school year."



    "You can go to the game later, but you need to practice your magic first."



    "Yes ma’am. Well, at least you’re showing me something new. I do love new spells. What is it?"



    The two step walk through the doors and step outside. Celestia extends her massive wings and answers, “Hm. I’ll tell you right now and not even practice...if you beat to the Ballroom first! Ready, set, go!” The white princess immediately flies into the air heading towards a beautiful gigantic castle on the side of a mountain near the city. Amity grins and swiftly follows her mother trying to fly faster.



    The two fly over a garden maze and can see the Castle Ballroom through the windows. Celestia and Amity playfully bump each other as they fly to the doors of the ballroom. The two alicorns are neck and neck and are about to crash through the doors, but Celestia screams, “If you win, you’re grounded!”



    Amity shockingly shouts, “What?!” She slows down allowing Celestia to enter the Castle Ballroom first. Amity snarls and rushes in behind her, “No fair, Mom! You cheated!”



    "I never said I couldn’t say things like that. Can’t argue with that,” a cocky Celestia says to her daughter who perks her lips out. “Oh come on now.” Celestia uses her magic auora to control Amity and bring her right into her mothers arms, and the white alicorn hugs her daughter while rubbing her hoof on Amitys head.



    Amity shrieks, “Ah! No Mom, you’ll ruin my mane!” Amitys horn then glows gold for a second, and she is engulfed by a white flash and vanishes. Suddenly, a second white flash appears behind her mother, and Amity appears.



    "Are you going to show me the new spell?" Amity enthusiastically asks.



    Celestia chuckles and calmly answers, "Not yet. First, keep practicing your teleportation spell."



    Amity's enthusiasm quickly deteriorates, "Mom, really? That's like the most basic spell I know. Heck, I learned it when I was two. You saw how fast I did it just then."



    Celestia raises her right eyebrow high showing annoyance. Amity makes a single chuckle and teleports herself again. She then appears at one of the corners of the room, and Celestia turns to look at her daughter. "Again," Celestia orders. Amity repeats her teleportation appearing in front of the main doors. "Again."



    Amity in an slightly annoyed tone, "Okay." She continues teleporting multiple times just as her mother said, but after the seventh time, she stops and realizes Celestia is gone. Amity looks around and asks, "Mom? Where did you go?"



    "Nowhere," Celestia whispers in Amitys ear scaring her.



    Amity shrieks and jumps in the air and her wings start flapping keeping her in the air. The spooked alicorn shouts, “That's not funny, Mom!" Celestia giggles underneath her hears, then suddenly Amity feels a slap across her plot. "Ow!" She turns swiftly to see nothing. She is then tackled by her invisible mother and pinned to the floor.



    "Gotcha," Celestia says to Amity. She feels Celestia letting her free allowing the pink alicorn to stand. "This is your new lesson,” Celestia says making an echo in the room. “but answer this question first. What are the five senses?"



    Amity answers aloud, "Touch, hear, taste, smell, and see. Why?"



    "Well," Celestia replies, "there is a sixth sense that only unicorns and alicorns have: the sense of magic. Basically, because alicorns and unicorns are active magic users, both species can use their own magic to sense the magic within others including the passive species, earth ponies and pegasi."



    A confused Amity replies, "Well, that’s kinda neat, but how do I do it?"



    "I was able to spank you just then right?" Celestia answers. "Listen carefully because it is confusing at first, concentrate your magic just like you did with teleportation but be at a peaceful state. Just let your other senses go and clear your mind."



    Amity closes her eyes and concentrates as her mother instructed. Her horns gold auora surrounds it but nothing happens. She begins breathing harder trying to put herself in a peaceful state but is unsuccessful. Amity stops and breathes heavily and says, "Can't sense anything."



    "You're trying too hard,” Celestia replies. “Just focus on your horn and calm yourself. Then, when you are truly calm, you will feel something."



    "What is it that I will feel or supposed to be feeling?" Amity asks.



    "You’ll know.”



    Amity concentrates again but still with no success. She breathes in and out slowly again and again. She then starts to feel a small spark on the right side of her horn. It does not hurt her but can be felt by the alicorn. Then, the small spark grows in size. It consumes some portion of the horn then half then the whole right side of her horn. She is then tackled to the ground again.



    "Gotcha again," Celestia says.



    Amity playfully responds, "Not for long." Amity rolls over trying to get her mother off of her, but Celestia holds on and starts tickling her daughter with her wing feathers. Amity squeals and slides out of her mother's arms. Both princesses stand and stare each other down, and the pink princess leaps at Celestia who simply teleports herself right above Amity grabbing her again. Both drop to the ground laughing.



    Celestia calmly says, "You've grown up so much, Amity. It was like yesterday you were going to Kindergarten and now...you’re graduating. I love you."



    "I love you too, Mom," Amity replies.



    "After the graduation ceremony next month, what do you want to do to celebrate?" Celestia asks.



    Amity merely shrugs and turns her head to look at her mother, “I do want to stay with you. I actually want to be a princess like you doing princess stuff.”



    “No you don’t,” her mother responds. “It’s not easy doing this job, and I want you to have a legacy so ponies won’t think ‘just another princess’. You understand? Besides, technically you already are a princess.”



    Amity lays her head down on the ground, “‘just another princess’?” She looks over her mothers head to see her blank flank.



    Celestia then looks at her daughter's flank and says, "Oh, Amity. How many times have I said that..."



    "’It will come in time’. Too many, but I can't...” Amity sighs. “Your and Aunt Luna's cutie marks represent more than just raising or lowering the sun and moon. They stand for the marvelous things you both had done in the past. I'm 18 and still don't have one? When I look at my blank flank, it just reminds me that I've done…nothing. What kind of princess am I?"



    Celestia lays her head on her daughter's cheek and replies, "I understand how you feel, but you can't let it haunt you. If you work hard and stay true to yourself, destiny will reward you someday."



    "I hope so," Amity says.



    "I know so," Celestia responds kissing her daughter's cheek. Both princesses stand up. "Go ahead to the ball game. I have to lower the sun a bit for the afternoon," Celestia says. Amity hugs her, heads outside, and flies off.

     
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      jacosta24: Sorry nigga you gay
      
      MumblesBadly: Stem the Pink Tine!
      
      The_Lurker: Doing GOD's work
      
      wrenchjockey: rep on this post officially a wash
      
      HoodedN: Nah let him live in the black
    "Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness." - Alejandro Jodorowsky

    "America is not so much a nightmare as a non-dream. The American non-dream is precisely a move to wipe the dream out of existence. The dream is a spontaneous happening and therefore dangerous to a control system set up by the non-dreamers." -- William S. Burroughs

  11. #11
    100% Organic MumblesBadly's Avatar
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    Time is running out. The polls close today. Do your part to make a difference! Go vote if you haven't already!

    http://www.americanpokerawards.com/f...oses-thursday/

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    _____________________________________________
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    I actually hope this [second impeachment] succeeds, because I want Trump put down politically like a sick, 14-year-old dog. ... I don't want him complicating the 2024 primary season. I just want him done.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Were Republicans cowardly or unethical not to go along with [convicting Trump in the second impeachment Senate trial]? No. The smart move was to reject it.

  12. #12
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    Oh look. A new IP address.

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    shit·show
    /ˈSHit ˌSHō/
    noun
    1) a situation or event marked by chaos or controversy. 2) This site.

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    No Wi-Fi on this vote. Getting it done Chicago style folks. Vote early and often whether you're dead or alive.

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    shit·show
    /ˈSHit ˌSHō/
    noun
    1) a situation or event marked by chaos or controversy. 2) This site.

  14. #14
    Plutonium sonatine's Avatar
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    cant we pick someone other than polk tho?

    what a burger that guy is.
    "Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness." - Alejandro Jodorowsky

    "America is not so much a nightmare as a non-dream. The American non-dream is precisely a move to wipe the dream out of existence. The dream is a spontaneous happening and therefore dangerous to a control system set up by the non-dreamers." -- William S. Burroughs

  15. #15
    Gold handicapme's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sonatine View Post
    Early in the morning where the sun is shining bright just above the horizon, the staff of a high school in the glorious city of Canterlot is starting the day as usual, signing in, unlock the door, and prepare for lecturing. The teachers range from unicorns, pegasi, and earth ponies and vary in age. Some of have been teachers for a long time while others are new and have little experience.



    One educator is a middle aged unicorn who teaches the 12th grade and is straightening her desks and organizing her papers frantically. The distraught unicorn uses her magic descending fro her horn to levitate papers and cram them in a drawer in a complete disorganized way, and instead of closing the drawer in quietly, she slams it shut making a loud echo in the room. It also does not help that her classroom door is completely open allowing the cho to travel down the hall. The loud echo startles a much younger earth pony walking down the hall towards her room. The young pony turns around quickly to a large figure behind her and nervously smiles ten continues walking towards the room. The unicorn teacher sweating profusely sits in a wooden chair behind a metal desk and waits as she darts her eyes across the room ensuring it is clean and organized.



    Slight knocks then are heard on her classroom door, and a young earth pony says, "Mrs. Lily, your guest is here."



    The unicorn teacher swallows and responds, "Please bring her in."



    The earth pony steps aside and bows her head. The guest is majestic, tall, white, alicorn with two massive wings and a long pointed horn. Her flank has cutie mark of a bright sun, and the alicorn is wearing a golden crown, a golden chest amulet, and golden hoof shoes.



    Mrs. Lily steps off her chair, bows her head, and says, "Welcome, Princess Celestia. It is an honor having you in the school and in my classroom."



    "Thank you very much,” Celestia says. “I'm actually excited in telling the students about Equestrian history."



    Lily clears her throat, lifts her head, and in a very nervous tone says, "And the students will enjoy it, hopefully. Uh, do you need anything like water? I have bottles beside my desk. Would you like a snack? I have some fruit. Would you like a chair or a stool?"



    Celestia chuckles, "Mrs. Lily, don't be so nervous. I’m just here to tell a story. Nothing more. I'm perfectly fine by the way. When do the students arrive?"



    The teacher slows her breathing down and looks at her clock on her desk. "It's about 7:05 now. So, in about twenty minutes."



    "Well, until then," Celestia says, "tell me about yourself."



    Lily starts informing the princess about where she came from and what made her want to be a teacher, and after some time, young ponies enter the room quietly and nervously while staring at Celestia. Eventually, the time reaches 8:00 and the bell rings to start the school day. All the students except for one pony in the back sit silently and straight giving Princess Celestia their full attention.



    Celestia walks in front of the students with a smile, "Good morning, class." All of the students are quiet and just only stare at the princess.



    Mrs. Lily then yells, "Class, please respond!"



    Startled, the student shout at once, "Good morning, Princess Celestia."



    Celestia looks at the teacher and says, "Mrs. Lily, don't do that again." Lily blushes in embarrassment, and Celestia stares back to the students. "Class, please relax. I am simply here to tell you a story from history that occurred twenty-one years. First, does any pony know about Triton?"



    An eerie silence dominates the classroom atmosphere until a male unicorn with a deep voice in the middle of the room breaks the silence, "My mom told me that he was part of the Royal Family."



    Celestia answers back, "Correct. Specifically, my cousin."



    Then, a pegasus raises her right hoof, and Celestia looks at her allowing the pony to ask, "I heard he was mean, but you’re so nice. Why is that?”



    Celestia's smile deteriorates, "He actually wasn’t always like that. He was at one point... a wonderful pony.” Her smile returns, “ I remember when I, he, and Luna were little.



    "He was sweet, caring, and unselfish. I remember one time, Luna tripped and scrapped her knee a bit. She started to cry, and Triton was there to check on her before I had a chance. He used his magic to heal her, and we all continued playing. Whenever he was away, Luna and I sent him letters all the time, and he would write us back quickly. I even remember when I was about your age he created his own magic spell where he made whips out of his aoura. He used them to tickle us. We loved him dearly, and... I wish he was here as his former self. I guess this is where I should start the story.



    "As I said earlier, this happened twenty-one years ago, and this was during the time Discord was spreading his chaotic magic throughout Equestria. Much like Canterlot and Manehattan, the once great city of Pandora was greatly affected by his destructive magic, and during that time, the mayor of the city fled leaving it and the citizens to perish while he saved himself. Even after defeating Discord, the city was still in great peril. The violence and hatred was rampant. When some ponies tried taking control of the city, it was too much and would step own willingly or be assaulted. Luna and I could not abandon the towns and cities that needed our aid especially Canterlot. So, we contacted Triton and asked him to save Pandora, and he accepted and flew to the city immediately. From what I know, when he arrived at Pandora, half of the ponies greeted him while others were still violent. Despite negative reactions, he did as he promised: rebuild Pandora.



    "He constantly sent Luna and I letters informing us about his progress, and he was doing a magnificent job. After about three months, he told us the city had reclaimed its former glory. Violence had stopped, ponies had somewhere to live, and every pony had a job that contributed to the community. We were so proud of him and knew that he was perfect for this task. However, about two months after that message, the letters had stopped. Luna and I thought nothing of it at first. We figured he was busy or had forgotten, but after three months of no communication, we became worried and sent him a letter asking if he was okay. Instead of sending us a reply back the next day like he usually did, we didn’t hear from him until a week later. He responded with, 'Everything is fine. My city is glorious'.



    "We knew something was wrong and flew to Pandora immediately. We also took the Elements of Harmony in case it was something crucial. I'm glad we did. When we arrived at Pandora, what we saw was...disturbing. The city had regained its size, but it had a -you could say- gloomy and threatening atmosphere. No ponies expect for ones wearing black metal armor walked down the streets. Hanging on every street lamp were red flags with a six-pointed black star in the middle and Triton's face with total black eyes inside the star. Those flags sent chills down my spine. When we got to the middle of the city, we saw a massive castle which was not in Pandora before. We landed in front of two massive wooden doors, and as soon as we landed, the doors opened with Triton standing there. He was expecting us.



    "I could tell immediately something had changed. His eyes were bloodshot and were completely black with no sign of his bright blue iris. His mane, tail, and fur were normal colored but were... off. His black mane and tail were flowing like mine and Lunas but in an usual pattern. His blue fur was ragged and had dark red stripes like a zebra. He was wearing a dark blue crown and a black amulet around his neck both of which had various gems and diamonds all over them. Luna and I didn't want to believe it, but it was true by just the mere sight of him, Triton had embraced his dark magic and was triggered by greed.



    "Before I continue, I need to say this children: Please do not embrace your dark magic. Every pony has dark magic within themselves and anything could ignite or trigger it. Once it is triggered, never embrace it. It will turn you into a monster. I’ve seen it happen to Triton and later Luna. Back to the story.



    "We tried to reason with him but with no avail. He believed that he only lived for his gold and jewels and was..." Celestia closes her eyes tightly, breathes in and out, open her eyes, and continues, "willingly to die for it. He blatantly told us he made a law in the city to submit all wealth to him. I can't remember everything he said exactly...but I do remember this and something else later. He said this exactly, ‘These ponies don't mean anything to me for I am greater than all! I...am...a...god.' We tried telling him that we loved him and tried to convince him to turn back into his former self, instead though...he attacked.



    "It was an intense fight, and he was much stronger and more powerful than Luna and I had thought. I remember one moment of the fight where he demonstrated his power: We took the fight in the air, and Luna was hit by a powerful magic beam from him and collasped. I charged at him, and we were in a horn lock. For those who don't know, this is when two unicorns' or alicorns' horns are side by side, and one pony tries to overpower the other with magic and strength. Anyway, Triton and I were at a horn lock, and he overpowered me with ease pushing me down to the street below. Luna woke up, rushed in, and joined me in the lock. Despite having the both of us using all of our strength, Triton continued to push us down with ease. He definitely had a strength and power advantage, but we had speed and experience. I know you're wondering how we defeated him. Long story or fight short, we tried to force him down to the ground so we can use the Elements of Harmony while he was still down. I distracted him by engaging him in another horn lock while Luna stabbed him in his right shoulder and slashed across his back thighs with her horn. With Triton in intense pain, I overpowered him sending him flying across the street. To assure he would not escape, I used my horn and slashed his left wing. We used the Elements of Harmony to turn him into stone, but before we did, I remember Luna asking him, 'How could you, Triton?'



    "Triton wallowing in pain responded and this was the other second thing I remember him saying exactly, 'Go ahead, turn me stone but heed my words. I will return and this world will be mine! I am darkness! I am Triton! I AM GOD!' He's still in his stone imprisonment. We left him at the abandoned city he ruined. He and Pandora will become nothing more than myths."



    The students with faces of awe sit silently. Celestia looks at the clock at the back of the room and says, "You have a couple of minutes until the next class period. Any questions?"



    A unicorn raises his left hoof and he asks, "I know he did terrible things, but do miss him? Even a little?"



    "Yes," Celestia answers, "Just like how I miss Luna when I banished her ten years ago, I miss Triton a lot. He's still family after all."



    A different pony raises her right hoof, "I know this is off topic but..."



    "It's quite alright," Celestia says, " I don't mind answering any question."



    "Well," she hesitantly starts, "I was wondering where your husband is. I have heard of him but never seen him."



    Celestia smiles and says in a polite yet sad tone, "He's not with us now. He's not dead but on major royal duties elsewhere that has taken every minute of his life for the last sixteen years."



    The same unicorn asks, "Do you miss him?"



    Celestia responds, "Of course, my dear." As soon as the princess finishes, the bell rings. Before leaving the classroom, the students approach the princess, bow their heads, thank her for the story, and politely exit the room. The last student in the back of the classroom is a pink alicorn with gold and silver lining mane and tail, golden eyes, a blank flank, and a bookcase containing three massive textbooks on her back. She approaches Celestia with her eyes reaching the princess' upper chest making her the tallest student.



    "Great job, Mom," the alicorn says.



    "Thanks, Amity," Celestia says in a cheerful tone. "Now," Celestia tilts her head slightly to her left, "get your butt to class. Don't want a tardy on your last day of school." Amity chuckles and walks out the door.



    The last class of the day exists the classroom leaving the teacher and princess alone. The unicorn uses her magic to wrap a purse around her neck preparing to the leave with the princess. "Thank you so much, Your Majesty," Mrs. Lily says.



    "It was my pleasure," Princess Celestia replies. "But before we leave the school, may I see Amity's grades for these last nine weeks?"



    "Sure but why?" the teacher asks curiously.



    "Just to see how she did," Celestia answers.



    Mrs. Lily walks to her desk, opens a drawer, and shows a file with "Amity" written on the tab. She places it on her desk and opens the file containing highly graded tests, quizzes, homework, and rubrics.



    Celestia approaches, and as she observes each graded assignment, Lily proclaims, "She is- or was- a fantastic student and one of my smartest students without a doubt. She’s fast learning, responsive, respectful..."



    "What is this?" Celestia asks in concerned tone with an eyebrow raised. She stares at a test with a red 80 at the top, and she then turns her head to her left to see Amity standing in the classroom doorway. The pink alicorn darts her eyes left to right then smiles at her mother.



    "Your Majesty?" Mrs. Lily interjects. "That test was about a week ago, and it really didn't affect her average. Also, that was the highest grade. Please don't be mad at her. This test’s practically pointless."



    “Thank you, Mrs. Lily,” Princess Celestia says as she places the test on the desk then walks towards her daughter. She says to her pink daughter and says, "From now on, you will tell me every grade you make."



    Amity responds, "But today was my last day of school."



    "Exactly," her mother replies. "I was referring if you go to college." The two alicons walk down the hallway towards double. While behind her mother, Amity rolls her eyes behind Celestia's back. "Don't roll those eyes behind my back.” Celestia unexpectedly states. “I'll roll that little head of yours. Oh, and when we get home, we’ll practice your magic skills and something new to teach you."



    Amity dashes beside her mother, "But I wanted to help see the hoofball game tonight. It's the last one of the school year."



    "You can go to the game later, but you need to practice your magic first."



    "Yes ma’am. Well, at least you’re showing me something new. I do love new spells. What is it?"



    The two step walk through the doors and step outside. Celestia extends her massive wings and answers, “Hm. I’ll tell you right now and not even practice...if you beat to the Ballroom first! Ready, set, go!” The white princess immediately flies into the air heading towards a beautiful gigantic castle on the side of a mountain near the city. Amity grins and swiftly follows her mother trying to fly faster.



    The two fly over a garden maze and can see the Castle Ballroom through the windows. Celestia and Amity playfully bump each other as they fly to the doors of the ballroom. The two alicorns are neck and neck and are about to crash through the doors, but Celestia screams, “If you win, you’re grounded!”



    Amity shockingly shouts, “What?!” She slows down allowing Celestia to enter the Castle Ballroom first. Amity snarls and rushes in behind her, “No fair, Mom! You cheated!”



    "I never said I couldn’t say things like that. Can’t argue with that,” a cocky Celestia says to her daughter who perks her lips out. “Oh come on now.” Celestia uses her magic auora to control Amity and bring her right into her mothers arms, and the white alicorn hugs her daughter while rubbing her hoof on Amitys head.



    Amity shrieks, “Ah! No Mom, you’ll ruin my mane!” Amitys horn then glows gold for a second, and she is engulfed by a white flash and vanishes. Suddenly, a second white flash appears behind her mother, and Amity appears.



    "Are you going to show me the new spell?" Amity enthusiastically asks.



    Celestia chuckles and calmly answers, "Not yet. First, keep practicing your teleportation spell."



    Amity's enthusiasm quickly deteriorates, "Mom, really? That's like the most basic spell I know. Heck, I learned it when I was two. You saw how fast I did it just then."



    Celestia raises her right eyebrow high showing annoyance. Amity makes a single chuckle and teleports herself again. She then appears at one of the corners of the room, and Celestia turns to look at her daughter. "Again," Celestia orders. Amity repeats her teleportation appearing in front of the main doors. "Again."



    Amity in an slightly annoyed tone, "Okay." She continues teleporting multiple times just as her mother said, but after the seventh time, she stops and realizes Celestia is gone. Amity looks around and asks, "Mom? Where did you go?"



    "Nowhere," Celestia whispers in Amitys ear scaring her.



    Amity shrieks and jumps in the air and her wings start flapping keeping her in the air. The spooked alicorn shouts, “That's not funny, Mom!" Celestia giggles underneath her hears, then suddenly Amity feels a slap across her plot. "Ow!" She turns swiftly to see nothing. She is then tackled by her invisible mother and pinned to the floor.



    "Gotcha," Celestia says to Amity. She feels Celestia letting her free allowing the pink alicorn to stand. "This is your new lesson,” Celestia says making an echo in the room. “but answer this question first. What are the five senses?"



    Amity answers aloud, "Touch, hear, taste, smell, and see. Why?"



    "Well," Celestia replies, "there is a sixth sense that only unicorns and alicorns have: the sense of magic. Basically, because alicorns and unicorns are active magic users, both species can use their own magic to sense the magic within others including the passive species, earth ponies and pegasi."



    A confused Amity replies, "Well, that’s kinda neat, but how do I do it?"



    "I was able to spank you just then right?" Celestia answers. "Listen carefully because it is confusing at first, concentrate your magic just like you did with teleportation but be at a peaceful state. Just let your other senses go and clear your mind."



    Amity closes her eyes and concentrates as her mother instructed. Her horns gold auora surrounds it but nothing happens. She begins breathing harder trying to put herself in a peaceful state but is unsuccessful. Amity stops and breathes heavily and says, "Can't sense anything."



    "You're trying too hard,” Celestia replies. “Just focus on your horn and calm yourself. Then, when you are truly calm, you will feel something."



    "What is it that I will feel or supposed to be feeling?" Amity asks.



    "You’ll know.”



    Amity concentrates again but still with no success. She breathes in and out slowly again and again. She then starts to feel a small spark on the right side of her horn. It does not hurt her but can be felt by the alicorn. Then, the small spark grows in size. It consumes some portion of the horn then half then the whole right side of her horn. She is then tackled to the ground again.



    "Gotcha again," Celestia says.



    Amity playfully responds, "Not for long." Amity rolls over trying to get her mother off of her, but Celestia holds on and starts tickling her daughter with her wing feathers. Amity squeals and slides out of her mother's arms. Both princesses stand and stare each other down, and the pink princess leaps at Celestia who simply teleports herself right above Amity grabbing her again. Both drop to the ground laughing.



    Celestia calmly says, "You've grown up so much, Amity. It was like yesterday you were going to Kindergarten and now...you’re graduating. I love you."



    "I love you too, Mom," Amity replies.



    "After the graduation ceremony next month, what do you want to do to celebrate?" Celestia asks.



    Amity merely shrugs and turns her head to look at her mother, “I do want to stay with you. I actually want to be a princess like you doing princess stuff.”



    “No you don’t,” her mother responds. “It’s not easy doing this job, and I want you to have a legacy so ponies won’t think ‘just another princess’. You understand? Besides, technically you already are a princess.”



    Amity lays her head down on the ground, “‘just another princess’?” She looks over her mothers head to see her blank flank.



    Celestia then looks at her daughter's flank and says, "Oh, Amity. How many times have I said that..."



    "’It will come in time’. Too many, but I can't...” Amity sighs. “Your and Aunt Luna's cutie marks represent more than just raising or lowering the sun and moon. They stand for the marvelous things you both had done in the past. I'm 18 and still don't have one? When I look at my blank flank, it just reminds me that I've done…nothing. What kind of princess am I?"



    Celestia lays her head on her daughter's cheek and replies, "I understand how you feel, but you can't let it haunt you. If you work hard and stay true to yourself, destiny will reward you someday."



    "I hope so," Amity says.



    "I know so," Celestia responds kissing her daughter's cheek. Both princesses stand up. "Go ahead to the ball game. I have to lower the sun a bit for the afternoon," Celestia says. Amity hugs her, heads outside, and flies off.
    "I GOT NO TOE"

    #FreeFluffler #FreeThisGuyIsCreepy #lockupGarrett

  16. #16
    Gold Forum Wars's Avatar
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    Seems like the choices were different for my buddy Doug, but he was using his PC and not his phone...anyhow, he asked me to try to get a landslide win for this guy...

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  17. #17
    Platinum herbertstemple's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MumblesBadly View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by wrenchjockey View Post
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    Thanks for calling attention to this important election.
    Ugh! I can't stand listening to Doug Polk verbally ventilate. I might have enjoyed his style of delivery when I was 11.

    Typical Doug Polk analysis: "I like the raise here but calling is a good play too & folding would be alright as well."

  18. #18
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    WHAT I DO, I DO FOR RICK SANCHEZ.

    THAT IS MY STATEMENT. THERE WILL BE NO QUESTION AND ANSWER PERIOD.

    THANK YOU.

     
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      Rick Sanchez: my nigga
    shit·show
    /ˈSHit ˌSHō/
    noun
    1) a situation or event marked by chaos or controversy. 2) This site.

  19. #19
    Serial Blogger BeerAndPoker's Avatar
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    I highly doubt I'll watch but I have to see if the quality is as bad as last years was when it aired on twitch where they just put some camera on a stand in a corner.

    It starts about 30 minutes from the time of this post (8pm PST)


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