Bad beat: Two PFA users who bought pieces of me at the WSOP had my payment check to them stolen, and my bank account was used to buy shit at Target

[LarryLaffer]

Ok i'll condceed: it is illegal.

Damn, you are a slow-witted little fuck. 3 pages of your little diatribe all to reach this. You must impress your bicycle friends with how smart you are.

As for the difference b/n probation and parole, yeah, I understand. I just didn't care enough to read back through your little story to see which one fit. Recall, you were lying in that little report as I pointed out; one doesn't go to federal court for such little charges.

Little, get it?

when a case starts out a felony and pleads to a misdemeanor it still stays in federal court.
but hey, you're the expert, I'm just the guy who is living this nightmare. maybe you should've been my lawyer.
so yeah. there's that.


and for the record, it was a felony possession charge (over 29 grams is a felony and I had more than that, a lot more) that I pled down to a 28 gram misdemeanor possession charge.

[ftpjesus]

Ok now that Larry and Tellafriend have completely derailed this thread into a dick measuring contest (sorry Larry no short joke intended). Can we get back on topic and whats going on with the Target/USPS controversy at hand??

[Tellafriend]

Damn, you are a slow-witted little fuck. 3 pages of your little diatribe all to reach this. You must impress your bicycle friends with how smart you are.

As for the difference b/n probation and parole, yeah, I understand. I just didn't care enough to read back through your little story to see which one fit. Recall, you were lying in that little report as I pointed out; one doesn't go to federal court for such little charges.

Little, get it?

when a case starts out a felony and pleads to a misdemeanor it still stays in federal court.
but hey, you're the expert, I'm just the guy who is living this nightmare. maybe you should've been my lawyer.
so yeah. there's that.


and for the record, it was a felony possession charge (over 29 grams is a felony and I had more than that, a lot more) that I pled down to a 28 gram misdemeanor possession charge.

You are right little boy, I am the expert; and you are a lying, little piece of scamming shit.


From your thread


http://pokerfraudalert.com/forum/sho...highlight=jail



i got caught with a lot of weed , but plead out to a misdeamor (29 grams) which is standard as the Cook County Prosecuters office will do anything for a conviction, even if that means reducing a felony (which mine was to start) to a misdemeanor. I should've went to trial, as we had a winnable case, but I couldn't pay the extra money my lawyer at the time added to the original retainer deal i signed. (he was unethical because when i signed the original retainer, i was led to believe that it covered everything, including going to trial, which he was pushing for, and then upped it by 5k at the last minute. This was after i already refused a deal for 14-10 felony drug probation, expungeable. At the last minute, another ASA stepped in and reduced the charge to a misdemeanor, most likely to clear the docket in the wake of a federal investigation into cook county court system)


........ and there's more:



a misdemeanor of any type in Illinois is punishable by a maximum of 1 year in jail. So, taking into account you get one day out for one day in (meaning 1 year is 6 months with good behavior) you'd probably get that. But it's up to the judge. Now, 6 months in county means you'll end up at Statesville for what's called "dress in/dress out" meaning you will have to probably spend a week in prison before being released.






You can't even keep your story straight.






As for hiring me, you couldn't afford the retainer.

[LarryLaffer]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autism

[rum dick]

Why were you in "federal court" for a state charge? Makes zero sense for you to have been in federal court with that charge. Sorry if you'd already answered this question somewhere else.


Eta - the only way you should be in federal court is if you were facing federal charges. But that doesn't seem to be the case here. Namely, I believeyou were arrested by local police for possession and not a federal agency for say crossing state lines with intent to distribute. You don't end up in federal court on state charges even if we are talking a felony.

[wrenchjockey]

Yeah, I remember him saying something like "Cook County Federal Courthouse" once. brb while I find it.

It's here: http://www.pokerfraudalert.com/forum...some-pictures)

but LaffingGasLarry already beat me to the punch.

[LarryLaffer]

Why were you in "federal court" for a state charge? Makes zero sense for you to have been in federal court with that charge. Sorry if you'd already answered this question somewhere else.

you're right, I wasn't in federal court. I was in felony court.


i go in and out of federal court during my job and i get them mixed up. Shit they're all the same to me sometimes.

219 s dearborn street is the federal court.

2600 s california is the felony court.

I'm in felony court. Even though i pled to a misdemeanor, it still stays in felony court because that's the judge who over sees my probation.

sorry for the confusion folks.

im not the brightest bulb sometimes (as you can tell)

[rum dick]

Also on a side note, I'm 99% sure tellafriend is an insurance defense attorney who can barely handle litigating a dog bite case.

[LarryLaffer]

Also on a side note, I'm 99% sure tellafriend is an insurance defense attorney who can barely handle litigating a dog bite case.

LoL like i said, i wouldn't trust this guy to handle a fuckin' traffic ticket.


probably got his law degree from University of Phoenix

[LarryLaffer]

Comments


Tellafriend: keep lecturing me

Ok what would you like to be lectured on.

oh and keep red repping me you goon. it really gets your point across, whatever it is.

[rum dick]

Gotcha. That makes sense. The federal court thing was the only part of your story that seemed odd. Rest checks out imo.

Anyhow, good luck and keep your chin up.

[LarryLaffer]

Gotcha. That makes sense. The federal court thing was the only part of your story that seemed odd. Rest checks out imo.

Anyhow, good luck and keep your chin up.

ty sir. everything seems to be going smoothly. have a drop on tuesday. have another status hearing next month as well as one more drop before it for september.


now that the thread has been derailed, because I was stupid enough to engage My Cousin Vinny over there, i apologize.


i'm interested to know what Druff has done with Target and the USPS.

[rum dick]

Also on a side note, I'm 99% sure tellafriend is an insurance defense attorney who can barely handle litigating a dog bite case.

LoL like i said, i wouldn't trust this guy to handle a fuckin' traffic ticket.


probably got his law degree from University of Phoenix

Totally. And now that I think about it, I have hard time believe the guy actually passed a bar exam. He's probably just a bitter legal assistant who likes to pretend he's an attorney on the internet.

[LarryLaffer]

LoL like i said, i wouldn't trust this guy to handle a fuckin' traffic ticket.


probably got his law degree from University of Phoenix

Totally. And now that I think about it, I have hard time believe the guy actually passed a bar exam. He's probably just a bitter legal assistant who likes to pretend he's an attorney on the internet.

you mean he works in the mail room of a law firm.

[Ricky]

Rummy I think your read here is way off.

just sayin

[LarryLaffer]

Comments


Tellafriend: you got something against mail clerks?

Autism is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by impaired social interaction, verbal and non-verbal communication, and restricted and repetitive behavior. Parents usually notice signs in the first two years of their child's life.[2] These signs often develop gradually, though some children with autism reach their developmental milestones at a normal pace and then regress.[3] The diagnostic criteria require that symptoms become apparent in early childhood, typically before age three

i guess your parents weren't paying attention either huh.

[LarryLaffer]

i only check in here to get a fucking update on the Target/USPS situation....

and then i have to engage My Cousin Vinny, which is my mistake obvs.


so back tot he topic..


Druff is going to meet the post master general, and it's going to go something like this:




and when they find the guy it'll go like this:

[varys]

Some seriously misguided tilt by tellafriend here.

[varys]

Buuut larry let s be honest... Mail clerk in a law office > bike messenger... right?

[LarryLaffer]

Buuut larry let s be honest... Mail clerk in a law office > bike messenger... right?

mail clerk could be better bc it's an employee job with benefits where as I'm an IC with no benefits.


but weigh that against the fact that I'm outside all day, getting excercise, with no boss in sight (he's on the radio dispatching), having a great time, sometimes hanging out at the beach (if I drop a package near there and dont have anything to do). Now some messengers get paid per delivery, I don't. I get a set fee for the day (which is more than $100).


and I get to people watch all day as well, lotta good looking women walking around. and I can play online poker on my phone. there's no restrictions on the internet like there is in an office. I don't have to use public bathrooms either bc our clients are cool and let us use them.


so yeah. and I routinely have mail clerks telling me they wish they had my job. it's never the other way around.


so it's a toss up. it depends on what you want. want stability and benefits? mail clerk. but you will have to deal with a boss and other people treating you like shit. want to be free from a cubicle or office and not deal with a boss and have to actually dress up for work? be a bike messenger.


believe it or not, since I've been doing this 7 years, no one treats me like shit downtown. not even security.



oh and then there's shit like this: when I have to load my bag up and carry it around like a fuckin Sherpa.




but I get views like this: