Originally Posted by
Dan Druff
I just banned lol wow from the thread because he posted the same dumb shit 3 times. I left one of them up.
Pooh gave good advice. If the marriage is legitimately shitty and she's going to leave anyway, then have at it.
If you're just homewrecking because this is new and exciting for her, don't do it.
There is also a good chance that you will get emotionally into it and she won't want to leave her husband.
Believe it or not, I was briefly involved with a married woman once. It was 20 years ago.
I met her online and we were initially just friends, and had a number of things in common, including both being country music fans.
We had never talked on the phone, and only communicated online. The conversations were never sexual in nature.
Then one weekend her husband went on a trip (I forget where), and she gave me her phone # because she was "bored". I knew that I was heading into dangerous territory, but figured there was no harm in just calling my new friend.
We talked for 9 hours that night on the phone. We went to sleep, and the next day she sent me an e-mail telling me that she really enjoyed our conversation and was having some feelings about me that she wasn't proud of. I told her that I was also having those feelings, and we started an affair, with her going to pay phones to call me a few times a week. (She would make BS excuses to leave the house for 30-60 minutes.)
Finally she made up some story to her husband about why she had to go on some "retreat for mothers" (she had a 2-year-old daughter), and met up with me at a hotel in Manhattan Beach.
She had been telling me a bunch of crap about her husband. Claimed that he was a loser, that he quit everything he started, that he showed no passion for her or the relationship, and that he would rush through sex and that the whole relationship was unsatisfying for her.
She sounded sincere and I believed it without really questioning it.
We messed around a lot that weekend, and I could have fucked her, but I actually felt too guilty and stopped short of that.
I saw her one other time after that, where we met in Yorba Linda (about the halfway point between where we lived) and messed around in my car in some abandoned business park.
One big red flag was that SHE didn't feel guilty about anything. I asked her about it once, and she said that the only guilt she felt was leaving her daughter to sneak out and see me. She said she didn't feel a bit guilty about cheating on her husband. I should have run the other way.
After about 2 months of this, I tired of it. I hated the situation. I hated only being able to see her when she could sneak away. I hated having to talk to her only when she could call me from pay phones or her job. I felt guilty about doing this to her husband, even though I didn't know him, and even though she told me how awful he was.
The next time I spoke to her, I told her I thought that we were making a mistake, and we should go back to just being friends. Surprisingly, she agreed, and it seemed like it was a smooth ending.
It wasn't.
A few weeks later, I started talking to another girl in the same chat room, and she and I started talking on the phone. The married chick got wind of this and got SUPER jealous. Started sending me psycho e-mails and other crazy shit, demanding that I stop with the new girl, and telling me that my "moving on so quickly" indicated that I never cared about her. WTF?
After she seemed to calm down, she went into snake-in-the-grass mode, and secretly befriended the new girl for the purpose of trying to sabotage our budding relationship. She told her that I was telling people that I was just planning to use her, and didn't care about her, which was totally not true.
When I heard about this, I was furious. I called her at work and told her that I never wanted to speak to her again.
She then wrote me a 20-page e-mail begging me to forgive her, and basically lied about the entire situation.
I responded and told her that I didn't change my mind, and to leave me alone.
She then went even more psycho and gave out my personal info to some idiot in the chat room I had been fighting with, who proceeded to harass me at work.
I later found out that all of the stories about her husband were lies, and that he was actually a pretty good dude. That made me feel even worse.
Experience was a fucking nightmare. I swore never again, and I kept to it.
As a lol postscript, she sent me birthday e-mails in the following 3 years, again asking me if I'd like to talk to her again. I responded to the first and asked her to leave me alone. I ignored the second and third, and she finally went away.