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Thread: Going Head to Head With, & Bitch Slapping Some Delusional, Southern Bible Belt Hardcore Fundamentalist Christian Jesus Freaks

  1. #1
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    Going Head to Head With, & Bitch Slapping Some Delusional, Southern Bible Belt Hardcore Fundamentalist Christian Jesus Freaks

    (Be forewarned, this is a rather lengthy post)

    I have to admit, I've been seriously debating whether or not to post this exchange on PFA considering the fact that poker and religion don't exactly go hand in hand, but I'm still in the mood to tell this story, so fuck it.

    Please bear with me a moment while I set the stage, and make a few necessary disclaimers.

    To be clear, I have an 'intermediate' level grasp of scripture, having read both Old, and New Testament cover to cover, so I can confidently hold my own in discussions or debates concerning a 'supreme being', or Christian beliefs in general.

    I've always found theology in all forms to be not only fascinating, but thought provoking, and inspiring.

    My own personal beliefs and convictions in terms of what truly defines 'God' have gradually evolved over the years, and would consider myself a Pantheist.

    In short, the core philosophy of Pantheism is essentially the acknowledgment of 'God', but on a much more cosmic, somewhat abstract scale. A few of my fellow Pantheists include the likes of Carl Sagan, Steven Hawking, Albert Einstein, Walt Whitman, Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau (among other notables)

    With that said, I think it's not only absurd, but flat out comical that in this day and age, after humanity has made such tremendous strides in technology, medicine, space exploration etc, that so many cultures in this world still cling to these prehistoric, antiquated ideologies from the bible/Quran like a warm blanket.

    I suppose what dramatically changed my core belief structure and perception about 'God', was after seeing images from the Hubble telescope for the very first time, and becoming fascinated with astronomy...arriving at the realization that our universe is so incredibly vast, with literally billions of other galaxies just like our Milky Way.

    It dawned on me, that for the very first time in human history, we have an unprecedented glimpse into the depths of the cosmos...which in my opinion, changes everything about how we should define and interpret what 'God' really means.

    Well, the proverbial shit hit the fan about a week ago on Facebook, when an old client of mine issued a bold, sweeping condemnation of all homosexuals immediately following the supreme court ruling on gay marriage...essentially declaring that they were doomed to perish in flames by the hand of 'God'.

    Now obviously I'm not gay, or even remotely bi-curious for that matter. I'll never comprehend how a dude can be turned on by cock, or another dudes hairy asshole. It actually makes me want to puke even thinking about it. (although I have no objections whatsoever to hot lesbians)

    But nevertheless, I'm offended and annoyed by the fact that the vast majority of the homosexual community consistently flaunt sexual fetishes with flamboyant gay parades, and cramming this 'alternate lifestyle' down the collective throats of the rest of society who could really give a flying fuck what others do in the bedroom behind closed doors.

    But my personal preferences aren't really relevant in this particular context. I'm not homophobic in the least, and have a handful of openly gay friends. I've always done my best not to judge others for the most part, while accepting the reality that people will always have contrasting priorities, tendencies, and preferences when it concerns sexuality, politics, and of course, religion.

    So before I post this exchange, it's probably worth noting that the OP is also an 'ordained minister' in an all black church...which makes the whole discussion (which spanned almost 3 days) even more ironic on multiple levels.

    Posting screen shots with all names omitted. If there are any doubts about their authenticity, I'm happy to provide screen shots of the uncensored originals. The entire discussion is posted chronologically below along with my commentary

    So without further adieu', lets get the party started....












    I guess what instantly set me off lighting a raging fire under my ass cheeks, was this stomach turning reference to 'REAL' Christians (whatever the fuck that's supposed to mean).

    So I busted off two verses of scripture that immediately came to mind which I felt were relevant, and as you can see, the reaction was defensive out of the gate.



    ___











    James 4:11 in your face bitches




    ___









    vnh Shannan lol


    starts to heat up a bit now...




    ___









    Colossians 3:11 you fucking slopes

    suck on it



    ___









    'Saints of God, listen up'

    just wow lol

    I did my best to be an adult, and engage in civil debate, but my patience was gone




    ___









    His holiness the so called 'ordained minister' (who probably got his certification straight out of a fucking Crackerjack box) decided to serve up the character assaults, clearly grasping at straws

    more backlash follows...




    ___









    ____




    I'll post a follow up in this thread soon with plenty more of of the same lunacy, hypocrisy, and self righteous grandstanding from these nitwits.

    Apparently, I'm a 'lost soul', so please pray for me in the interim

    TIA

     
    Comments
      
      Prime: I like where this is headed
      
      Hockey Guy: I'll pray for you. Oh wait, no I won't.
      
      SrslySirius: :whofuckincares
      
      IamGreek: Tyde bringing the hits rep
      
      Belly Buster: no objections whatsoever to hot lesbians rep
      
      4Dragons: di immortales virtutem approbare, non adhibere debent
      
      YUUP: Jesus fucking Christ. Worst thread in history, and I've started most of the top 5
      
      Suicide King: You're playing great
      
      Corrigan: jewdonk is god
      
      anonamoose: I stopped reading after the obviously homophobic statements about gay stereotypes.
      
      Benford: Rep b/c of supreme importance of topic. Einstein was into Baruch Spinoza's philosophies fwiw
      
      Pooh: holy fuck i didn't read a work of this shit.
      
      chinamaniac: can't wait to read
      
      vegas1369: You're arguing with people that are clearly low on intellect. It is very entertaining though.
      
      zealanddonk: some of my best friends are negro rep

  2. #2
    "You and I both know your happiness changes like the wind."

    "You enjoy conflict because it gives you the attention you so desperately need. You're lonely."



    Rofl, this guy already has you figured out, Tyde.

     
    Comments
      
      Tyde: saw you log in and immediately gravitate to this thread. such a feeble minded halfwit little boy. grow up dude

  3. #3
    So wait this guy is a professional client of yours?

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by BetCheckBet View Post
    So wait this guy is a professional client of yours?
    Well, the proverbial shit hit the fan about a week ago on Facebook, when an old client of mine issued a bold, sweeping condemnation of all homosexuals immediately following the supreme court ruling on gay marriage


    reading comprehension skills FTL

    over 3 years ago yes, he was a client of mine, as in past tense

    we've stayed in contact since speaking often...and had some very intense conversations about God and theology in general, among other topics

    but his comments after the gay marriage ruling just rubbed me the wrong way, and I felt compelled to respond with some fire.

     
    Comments
      
      Hockey Guy: I don't hold you being Mexican against you at all. Carry on.

  5. #5
    Bronze backdoorb's Avatar
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    Another day another hit
    Holler at me via Myspace

  6. #6
    JAMES 4.11 skatz

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Tyde View Post
    Well, the proverbial shit hit the fan about a week ago on Facebook, when an old client of mine issued a bold, sweeping condemnation of all homosexuals immediately following the supreme court ruling on gay marriage


    reading comprehension skills FTL

    over 3 years ago yes, he was a client of mine, as in past tense

    we've stayed in contact since speaking often...and had some very intense conversations about God and theology in general, among other topics

    but his comments after the gay marriage ruling just rubbed me the wrong way, and I felt compelled to respond with some fire.
    Scorners set a city aflame, But wise men turn away from anger

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by BetCheckBet View Post
    Scorners set a city aflame, But wise men turn away from anger


    Actually glad you posted that BCB

    I don't consider it 'anger' at all, in fact quite the opposite.

    When it comes to debating, discussing, or arguing about hot button issues, I thrive on the conversation itself, and it has nothing to do with 'anger' in the least.

    In this particular case with the discussion posted above, I was mindful to be civil, and didn't ever resort to blatant profanity, insults, or character assassinations, despite the surplus of hypocrisy

    It's enjoyable and deeply satisfying for me to dive head first into sensitive issues and stand firm to my beliefs and opinions, even when the conversation gets close to the boiling point.

    But I'll say that I don't have any respect for others who issue blanket judgments, while posturing as if they are without faults or flaws of their own, sitting atop a pedestal with a smirk and a self righteous attitude.

    Yes that actually does piss me off, so in some cases yes...anger would be a mitigating factor, but not the driving force behind the simple fact that I thrive on interesting conversation and love a good argument...not for the sake of arguing in itself, but because it's just fun

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by Tyde View Post

    Now obviously I'm not gay, or even remotely bi-curious for that matter. I'll never comprehend how a dude can be turned on by cock, or another dudes hairy asshole. It actually makes me want to puke even thinking about it. (although I have no objections whatsoever to hot lesbians)

    But nevertheless, I'm offended and annoyed by the fact that the vast majority of the homosexual community consistently flaunt sexual fetishes with flamboyant gay parades, and cramming this 'alternate lifestyle' down the collective throats of the rest of society who could really give a flying fuck what others do in the bedroom behind closed doors.

    I'm not homophobic in the least, and have a handful of openly gay friends.



    Real progress here folks. We live in a world where saying homophobic shit doesn't make you homophobic.

    ho·mo·pho·bi·a
    ˌhōməˈfōbēə/Submit
    noun
    dislike of or prejudice against homosexual people.

     
    Comments
      
      SrslySirius: The lady doth protest too much, methinks

  10. #10
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    making a quick tequila run



    Chapter 2 going up shortly, with plenty more screen shots from the loony bin

  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by Tyde View Post
    Well, the proverbial shit hit the fan about a week ago on Facebook, when an old client of mine issued a bold, sweeping condemnation of all homosexuals immediately following the supreme court ruling on gay marriage


    reading comprehension skills FTL

    over 3 years ago yes, he was a client of mine, as in past tense

    we've stayed in contact since speaking often...and had some very intense conversations about God and theology in general, among other topics

    but his comments after the gay marriage ruling just rubbed me the wrong way, and I felt compelled to respond with some fire.

    i think you misunderstood the question...

    care to explain the service to your Client? if you don't care to i have provided an answer that will suffice for the PFA community

    (in other words, tell your story or we will tell one for you, lol...it's the price you pay for being THE PFA ROCK-STAR)



    i don't think there was anything sexual in your service despite the implication in the question

    my read, you were buying alcohol for an underage: always easy money for any neighborhood wino


    and your client no longer does business with you because he reached legal buying age


    anyway, carry on with your philosophical and spiritual discourse
    Last edited by GrenadaRoger; 07-12-2015 at 07:07 PM.
    (long before there was a PFA i had my Grenade & Crossbones avatar at DD)

  12. #12
    Oh my god, Morty! You're caught in a space-time differential! Your.. your... your pockled flesh is sagging and withering at the normal rate, but you still have the mind of a 15 year old. You gotta snap out of it, Morty. Log off Facebook and find a sense of self-worth outside of internet battles. Just sit tight and I'll be right over. I'm gonna blast you with tachyons, Morty. You won't feel a thing, but you might loose your teeth. Two birds with one stone, Morty, am I riiiiiight?!

     
    Comments
      
      Tyde: infantile, unoriginal, and sadly lacking in comedic value
      
      RichardBrodiesCombover.: looooooooooooool HOF
      
      sonatine: THIS GUY FUCKS.
      
      El Gallo: Fuck yes
      
      zealanddonk: missing teeth would let him service his clients better rep

  13. #13
    catholic toddlers in the hizzaaaayyyyyyy

  14. #14
    Seriously though I blame it all one their whore mothers

  15. #15
    If anyone hears My sayings and does not keep them, I do not judge him; for I did not come to judge the world, but to save the world.

  16. #16
    Quote Originally Posted by Tyde View Post

    Now obviously I'm not gay, or even remotely bi-curious for that matter. I'll never comprehend how a dude can be turned on by cock, or another dudes hairy asshole. It actually makes me want to puke even thinking about it. (although I have no objections whatsoever to hot lesbians)

    Of course the time you rammed your cock in my mouth then took a picture with your iPhone somehow doesn't factor into your sexual ethics somehow. Remind me what scriptures endorse fucking your pet's mouth, righteous guy?

     
    Comments
      
      zealanddonk: Disturbing

  17. #17
    Diamond chinamaniac's Avatar
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    did not read a WORD YET

    TYDE IS GOD

  18. #18
    I keep hearing about that alleged bestiality. Is that some sort of sick joke, or did that actually happen?

     
    Comments
      
      Tyde: why don't you ask the dupe dedicated to my dead dog, or another reliable source.
      
      zealanddonk: damned if you do, damned if you dont rep
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    Take someone like garrett, for example. A lot of people here don't like him, but he also makes a lot of quality posts here.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    I can't believe I'm saying this, but jsearles can actually be a good poster when he tries to be good.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    I thought BGC had a lot of good and funny posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Dan Druff View Post
    In splitthis' case, she's also a longtime member of this community, and has no history of harassing or threatening people in real life.

  19. #19
    Diamond chinamaniac's Avatar
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    HOF thread tyde , well done , can't wait for part 2

  20. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by SrslySirius View Post
    I keep hearing about that alleged bestiality. Is that some sort of sick joke, or did that actually happen?
    It happened. Notice Tyde creatively didn't deny?
    It's hilarious that we as a society think everyone can be a dr, a lawyer, an engineer. Some people are just fucking stupid. Why can't we just accept that?

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