Where has time gone?
by
, 04-20-2019 at 07:21 PM (13966 Views)
I can't believe two years have passed since my last blog. How have I let this happen? A better question is what has happened? Why have I ignored writing and my first love Poker?
The simple answer is despair. Poker has given me and taught me so much but at the end of the day all the money that I have won hasn't given me the ability to accept the losing. The best tournament players are cashing about 33% of the time that means about 66% of the time there losing. On top of that even if you make the money but don't win the tournament you feel like you lost.
Tournament poker is a bitch but in turn the feeling of winning a tournament and being the last player standing is exhilarating and one of the most rewarding feelings I have ever encountered. Video game hunting has been a substitution for that rush. Finding hundreds of dollars worth of games for pennies on the dollar is very satisfying but will never compare to winning a poker tournament and there lies the problem.
That fire to play again has been building over the past few months and has grown as the WSOP approaches. I have played 2 small stakes NLH tournaments online and made plenty of mistakes but got lucky and cashed in one. I also got up today and played a live $65 WSOP qualifier at my local casino where 1st place gets a seat for the Colossus and $600 spending money. I late regged it and played weak for 3 hours mostly folding and trying to slow play big hands.
I was playing bad but I still doubled up verses a aggressive player. I was making a lot of stupid mistakes but nothing major untill I misread that same aggressive player for being weak and shoved my middle pair into his top pair and got crippled. I blame it on rust and mental fatigue. I used to be able to play my "A" game for hours on end but when I first started playing seriously I couldn't focus for longer than 2-3 hours.
I'm back on that same boat. I have to condition myself and get back to that elite level I was once at. I wont reach it without hard work and sacrifice so I've decided to focus and start working on my game 100%. I went ahead and took some time off of work with the intention of playing the 2019 WSOP. My goal is to play 5-6 days a week until May 31, 20019 and be prepared to play 3 WSOP tournaments at an elite level in Vegas with a goal of winning one.
I will write a weekly update to keep anyone reading this in the loop but most importantly I will write to hold myself accountable. In the past writing about poker has helped me grow my game immensely and most importantly to be honest with myself. A problem many poker players have. I noticed as soon as I started writing and being honest to myself my game improved and I became a winning player.
I miss winning and being successful in poker and I want it back so bad. It's time to put in the hard work and get what I want. It's time to hit the tables and start studying. No more excuses. If you dont grind you dont shine.
Good luck out there and I will see you next week...